BREAKING: France Joins US-Iran War; Immediately Surrenders to Both Sides
PARIS — Citing “a rare moment of bipartisan exhaustion” in global affairs, France has formally declared itself a co-belligerent in...
France
BREAKING: France Eager to Join Denmark-US Conflict So They Can Surrender to Someone Soon
PARIS — In a move described by diplomats as “both proactive and deeply traditional,” the French government has formally expressed...
BREAKING: France eager to get into Ukraine-Russia war so that they can surrender to someone soon
PARIS—France has announced that it is eager to join the ongoing conflict between Ukraine and Russia, expressing a fervent desire...
BREAKING: Dozens turn to salt when looking at Eiffel Tower
FRANCE- Dozens of people from around the globe have been mysteriously turning into pillars of salt throughout the City of...
BREAKING: France surrenders to invading migrants
PARIS—Anxious to finally surrender to someone for the first time in years, the French government has officially announced its surrender...
France celebrates killing babies to save them the embarrassment of surrendering later on
PARIS—In a groundbreaking move that has left the international community reeling, the French government has announced its decision to embrace...
BREAKING: France surrenders immediately following Biden’s bombing of Iraq and Syria
In a dazzling display of diplomatic gymnastics, France has once again taken the lead in the Surrender Olympics, this time...
France’s impending civil war: a race to see which side surrenders first
PARIS—In a twist that only the French could orchestrate, the land of baguettes and berets finds itself on the brink...
BREAKING: France surrenders World Cup final
DOHA, QATAR—Argentina won the 2022 World Cup final after France surrendered. "We won the last World Cup and it just...
BREAKING: France has just surrendered
PARIS—After Russian forces invaded Ukraine at 5am local time, France, which is thousands of miles away wants nothing to do...
