Starbucks Unveils new ‘Kamala Word Salad’ with a few shreds of lettuce topped with verbal diarrhea
Starbucks, the coffee giant known for staying on the pulse of cultural trends, has unveiled its latest culinary masterpiece: the...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
JUST IN: Kamala Harris reassures Hurricane victims that she was the first VP to tour an abortion facility
In an emotional press conference today, Vice President Kamala Harris offered comfort to the victims of Hurricane Helene by reminding...
BREAKING: Florida chooses possible starvation over vegan meats as Hurricane Milton approaches
Grocery shelves across Florida are closing up shop in preparation for a category 5 hurricane Milton. The ones that are...
BREAKING: Korean flamethrower squirrels have reached the US
Hot on the heals of the dual plagues of COVID-19 and the Asian murder hornets, Korean flamethrower squirrels have reached...
BREAKING: Buttigieg requires all vehicles bringing aid to hurricane victims to be electric cars
In a bold and forward-thinking move that has left disaster relief teams scrambling, Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg has announced that...
BREAKING: Truckers sneak hurricane relief into North Carolina by disguising aid as ‘Illegal Immigrants’ to outwit federal roadblocks
CHARLOTTE, NC — In a brazen display of disrespect to federal agencies, truckers across the U.S. have joined forces to...
Liz Cheney endorses Kamala Harris: ‘She will bomb countries I haven’t even thought of yet’
In a shocking twist that has sent shockwaves through the political universe and possibly several foreign nations, former Wyoming congresswoman...
BREAKING: In lieu of aid, Kamala Harris enrolls all victims of Hurricane Helene in the Jelly of the Month Club
In a move that has left hurricane victims across North Carolina both confused and sticky-handed, Vice President Kamala Harris announced...
BREAKING: Harris reassures North Carolina hurricane victims that the US will be donating another $200 billion to Ukraine in their name
AUGUSTA, GA—In a deeply emotional press conference today, Vice President Kamala Harris addressed the people of North Carolina who are...
BREAKING: Newsom signs bill requiring photo ID to criticize another bill that allows people to vote without photo ID
SACRAMENTO, CA—In a groundbreaking move designed to "protect the integrity of free speech," California Governor Gavin Newsom has signed a...
