BREAKING: Tim Walz confirms he will be using Tampax Pearl Super Plus tampons for tonight’s debate against JD Vance
In a bold move that is raising both eyebrows and awareness, Minnesota Governor Tim Walz has announced that he will...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Victims of Hurricane Helene identifying as illegal immigrants so they can get some federal aid from the Biden-Harris administration
ASHVILLE, NC—Victims of Hurricane Helene in North Carolina have discovered a clever life hack: identifying as illegal immigrants in order...
BREAKING: Joe Biden endorses Donald Trump in 2024 presidential race in stunning October Surprise
WASHINGTON, DC—In a shocking twist that has left political pundits scrambling, President Joe Biden has officially endorsed his longtime rival,...
BREAKING: After seeing devastating floods caused by Hurricane Helene in North Carolina, Biden agrees to send $15 billion more to Ukraine
WASHINGTON, DC—After learning about devastating floods caused by Hurricane Helene, Biden agrees to send $15 billion more to Ukraine and...
BREAKING: Fans shocked that celebrities who rap about drugs, rape, and murder are actually horrible people in real life too
NEW YORK—In an absolutely unforeseen twist that has blindsided his fanbase, music mogul and notorious “Freak Off” party host P...
BREAKING: New fake government economic data in line with completely fabricated economic forecast
In a stunning but entirely predictable announcement, the Federal Reserve proudly reported that the latest batch of completely made-up economic...
BREAKING: Feds indict NYC Mayor Eric Adams for ‘Unauthorized Complaining About Federal Immigration Policy’
NEW YORK—In a shocking display of federal overreach that surprised absolutely no one, the Biden/Harris administration's DOJ has officially indicted...
BREAKING: P. Diddy launches ‘Pedophiles for Harris’ group from jail
In a move that’s raising eyebrows across the political spectrum, music mogul Sean “P Diddy” Combs has officially launched a...
BREAKING: Merrick Garland offers to match Ryan Routh’s $150,000 bounty for whoever can ‘finish the job’ on Trump
WAHINGTON, DC—In a jaw-dropping escalation of governmental ingenuity, the Department of Justice, under Attorney General Merrick Garland, has reportedly decided...
BREAKING: Gavin Newsom Signs Bill Making It Illegal for Anyone in California to Talk Except Him
SACRAMENTO, CA – In a bold legislative move that has left political analysts, constitutional scholars, and anyone with a mouth...
