BREAKING: Pentagon officials hire Bill Belichick to spy on Iran for WWIII
Pentagon officials have confirmed they have hired the world's most experienced spy to assist in the lead up to World...
Entertainment
Charlize Theron begins transitioning son into Tyrannosaurus Rex
Hollywood actress and professional virtue signaler Charlize Theron is the perfect mother, treating her children exactly as they want to...
ABC swaps offensive Red Ryder BB Gun in ‘A Christmas Story’ with Frozen Elsa doll
The beloved Christmas movie A Christmas Story is getting a facelift in the new progressive era. Now, instead of Ralph...
Disney to replace entire ‘Rise of Skywalker’ with 3 hours of Baby Yoda clips
After disappointing Last Jedi gross sales accompanied with a low average rating, Disney is hedging its bets for the last...
Alyssa Milano to play Nancy Pelosi in new impeachment film: ‘We Blew It’
As the impeachment hearings make their way through the United States House of Representatives, more stories of parents, growing up,...
Trump creates single-payer Dept. of Movies with a max actor salary of $50,000 a year
In response to consistent pleas for socialist policies from Hollywood actors, President Trump has created a Soviet-style single-payer Department of...
Biden hires Jar Jar Binks as new speech writer
In an effort to stay relevant with the people he hopes to command as president, Democratic front runner Joe Biden...
China cracks down on Green Arrow propaganda for inspiring rebellious archery
Due to the usage of archery by Hong Kong Protesters, The People’s Republic of China is using the powerful influence...
Bob Iger joins MasterClass for class on ruining beloved movie franchises
Disney chairman-CEO Bob Iger has signed on to the MasterClass digital education service, offering a course in how to ruin beloved movie...
Bernie Sanders says he’ll put AOC in ‘very important’ bartending role in White House
Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) has a “very, very important role” waiting for her in the White House should fellow Democratic...
