Elon Musk buys Kim Kardashian and Kanye West to fix their marriage
Elon Musk announced his most recent multi-billion dollar purchases: Kim Kardashian and Kanye West. “I invested in the West-Kardashian marriage...
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FBI says ‘the Big Guy’ in Hunter’s emails was comedian Louie Anderson not Joe Biden
WASHINGTON, DC--Emails by the Federal Bureau of Investigation reveal explicit conversations between Hunter Biden and the comedian, Louie Anderson they...
To prepare for war, Ukrainian troops undergo emergency Critical Race Theory training
UKRAINE—As the nation awaits a Russian invasion, military leaders ordered all soldiers receive last minute critical race theory lessons in...
Russia amasses troops at Ukraine border to spell ‘Let’s Go Brandon!’
WASHINGTON, DC—Pentagon officials have released of aerial photos of Russian tanks, trucks and equipment amassing on the Ukraine border positioned...
CNN to report on the thousands of people not shot in Chicago over the weekend
(CNN)—We at CNN have a new policy in which, instead of reporting on the number of people shot and killed...
John Kerry seen unloading private jet from transport jet en route to Climate Conference
LONDON—President Biden’s Climate Czar John Kerry was accused by critics of attempting to stage a photo op on Saturday after...
UPDATE: Taliban conducting mostly peaceful beheadings and other news
Welcome to PNN news, the Puppet News Network. This is your up to the minute update. Taliban forces continue to...
Cleveland Indians win the next World Series after changing their name to Dominion Voting Machines
The long lasting name for the movie-star Cleveland Indians baseball team has come to an end. Many other infamous teams...
Bill Gates wins Oscar for best villain in real life
HOLLYWOOD—The 93rd Academy Awards broke a lot of new ground this year including awards for best real-life villain, which went...
BREAKING: US military to accept people who identify as good soldiers but are biologically no-skill fat slobs
WASHINGTON, DC—In a brave path forward under the Biden administration, the Pentagon is set to eliminate all discrimination in the...
