Jeffrey Epstein’s prison guards hired to ensure secure election in Philadelphia
PHILADELPHIA—The New York Metropolitan Jail guards who were watching Jeffrey Epstein while he was suicided have been brought in to ensure...
Newsbeat
BREAKING: Wisconsin officials find 170,000 Biden ballots on Chinese shipping container
MADISON, WI—It appeared that President Donald Trump was going to win Wisconsin in the 2020 election until—quite miraculously—election officials discovered...
PA election results delayed until 2022 due to use of Common Core math to tally votes
PHILADELPHIA—Election officials in Pennsylvania warned that they may not have results for the presidential election until some time after 2021...
BREAKING: Biden gets largest turnout ever stopping by a Trump rally
BUTLER, PA—Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden got his largest turnout ever for a campaign rally as he made a last-minute...
Biden promises to transgender in first 100 days, becoming the first woman president
In a last minute pander, Joe Biden has announced that, if he's elected, he will transition to a woman to...
Kamala Harris promises to remove white stripes on the US flag if elected
US—Democratic presidential vice-presidential nominee Kamala Harris has promised to finally get rid of the white stripes on the American flag,...
Ukraine treasury honors Joe Biden with a “zero cents” coin
KIEV—Ukraine has honored the US Democratic presidential nominee with an official Joe Biden coin in support of the candidate through...
Biden rallies break out across Philadelphia following police shooting
Philadelphia city officials have issued a curfew for Wednesday night, after two days of Joe Biden rallies left dozens of...
In first act as associate justice, Amy Barrett mandates every woman have 10 children
WASHINGTON DC—The worst fears of progressives across the country have been realized as Amy Coney Barrett, in her first act...
BREAKING: MSNBC offers Melania Rachel Maddow’s spot if Donald drops out of the race
MSNBC calls it a 'win-win', an off season trade, 'in with the new, out with the old'. No matter how...
