Nearly 6% of Americans believe the crazy conspiracy theory that US elections are legitimate
US—A shockingly high 6% of the US population believe the crazy conspiracy theory that their elections are free and fair...
World
In response to Biden-Ukraine-FTX money laundering scandal, Congress to impeach Trump again
US—Rocked by revelations that now-bankrupt cryptocurrency company FTX and Alameda Hedge Fund used Ukrainian aid to donate to Democratic political...
BREAKING: NYC celebrates Hochul election by shoving 329 more people onto subway tracks
NEW YORK—New York Gov. Kathy Hochul is projected to win the state’s gubernatorial race, and New York is celebrating in only a way...
BREAKING: Pennsylvania elects first brain-dead Senator
PENNSYLVANIA—In a major defeat for ableism, voters of the Keystone State have elected the first braindead person to Senate, doubling...
Winner of $2.04 Billion Powerball jackpot announced after technical glitch
US—A single ticket sold in California has won a world record $2.04 billion Powerball jackpot, the Powerball committee declared following...
Hochul: ‘It’s a conspiracy theory that New Yorkers don’t want to die in a Nuclear Armageddon’
New York Gov. Kathy Hochul (D), said, Tuesday, that what really scares people in the Empire State isn't the threat...
Elon Musk shatters world record after going 12 hours without killing himself after publicly insulting Hillary Clinton
TWITVILLE, CA—Austere billionaire businessman Elon Musk has shattered the world record after going a full 12 hours without killing himself...
CNN: SUV found guilty on all accounts in mostly peaceful Waukesha parade accident
WAUKESHA, WI—A Wisconsin SUV accused of driving through a crowd at the 2021 Waukesha Christmas parade was found guilty Wednesday....
Stacey Abrams: ‘If we abort 2 Million babies this year we could send another $40 Billion to Ukraine’
ATLANTA—Georgia gubernatorial candidate and perennial election denier Stacey Abrams is promoting a savvy economic plan. "Inflation is really hitting us...
BREAKING: Spokesperson for Hell disputes Biden’s claim that the U.S. economy is ‘strong as hell’
WASHINGTON, DC—A spokesperson for the Underworld has disputed US President* Joe Biden's claim that the US economy is "strong as...
