Local men dominate International Women’s Day 
BREAKING: Democrats unveil bold new ‘Peace is War’ campaign in support of endless Ukraine conflict 
AOC horrified terrorists are running over people with gas-powered cars instead of electric vehicles 
CNN: More cars mysteriously drive themselves into German pedestrians 
Bondi assures Americans: ‘Epstein files coming soon—just need to blot out all the Israeli connections first’ 
BREAKING: FBI opens investigation into the upset parents of Uvalde shooting victims
WASHINGTON, DC—The Federal Bureau of Investigation has opened several investigations into the angry parents of the Uvalde, Texas mass shooting....
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Liberals take break from mourning gun deaths of innocent kids to demanding the abortion deaths of other innocent kids
US—Several abortion rights activists around the country have taken a break from mourning the deaths of the innocent kids killed...
BREAKING: Congress to pass new gun control law to make people obey current gun control laws
WASHINGTON, DC—Following another school shooting in which the alleged perpetrator violated several laws on his way to killing 19 people,...
Biden shocked his “gun-free school zone” law hasn’t worked
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden is shocked that a law he introduced in 1990 prohibiting guns at schools didn't work. "We...
BREAKING: Biden issues executive order outlawing shooting people at schools
US—Following a mass shooting in Uvalde, TX Monday, President* Biden has decided to take unprecedented measures to protect the country...
Bill Gates releases new book ‘I Want to Kill Half of You’
SEATTLE—Bill Gates recently released his new book, "I Want to Kill Half of You," in which he offers some insightful observations...
Bill Gates releases Windows OS for humans: ‘MonkeySoft’ Vista
SEATTLE—While Bill Gates officially has left the Windows board to focus on bioterrorism, he has returned briefly for a release...
BREAKING: AOC confirms her longtime boyfriend is pregnant with her child
WASHINGTON, DC—Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) is putting the unconfirmed reports about her love life to rest. In an exclusive interview with...
Elongate: SpaceX employee complains about Elon Musk’s huge rocket
AUSTIN—A former SpaceX employee is complaining about CEO Elon Musk's huge rocket in a scandal that has been dubbed "Elongate"....
