Talarico Polling Near 100 Percent Among Texas Lizard People 
Biblical Scholars Now Conclude Eve Answered “Not to My Knowledge” When Asked About the Fruit 
Ilhan Omar Comes Out of Hiding for an Appearance on Jerry Springer 
AOC: ‘These poor pumpkins have been drained of their spice by illegal poachers; this needs to stop!’ 
SURPRISE: Obama Defends Foreign-Born Politician Who Ran Under Another Name After Marriage Questions 
TX Gov Abbott installs marine barriers along the southern border to halt the catastrophic effects of climate change
In an unexpected move to combat the effects of climate change, Texas Governor Greg Abbott has unveiled a groundbreaking plan:...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Democrats Conduct Investigation To See If Constitution Played A Role In Recent Supreme Court Decisions
Senate Democrats have launched an investigation to determine if the Constitution played any role in a string of recent Supreme...
CNN: It’s illegal to view Hunter Biden committing felonies
(CNN) It has been discovered that the act of witnessing Hunter Biden committing felonies is now deemed illegal. As if...
EXCLUSIVE: Security tapes show AOC doing lines of cocaine in White House library
WASHINGTON, DC—Genesius Times have obtained security video tapes from the White House showing that the alleged cocaine left in the...
Biden tweets ‘The Cost of a 4th of July Cocaine Hit is Down $0.16 from Last Year’
WASHINGTON, DC—Giving new meaning to the term White House, President* Joe Biden recently took to Twitter to share a rather...
BREAKING: Biden outlaws reading the Declaration of Independence on 4th of July
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has issued an executive order outlawing the reading of the Declaration of Independence on the 4th...
Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Criticizes Judge Judy For Decision In Affirmative Action Case
The Supreme Court’s decision on affirmative action has sent Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez into a rage, blasting the justices for “upholding...
Where to Find a Copy of Your Credit Report
The task of finding a copy of your credit report may seem daunting, especially if it's your first time. But...
Macron caught fiddling as Paris burns to the ground
PARIS—French President Emmanuel Macron was caught playing his fiddle as reports came in that the entire city of Paris was...
BREAKING: Democrat Lawmakers Discover It’s Their Job To Pass Laws
Last week the Supreme Court invalidated President Joe Biden’s student loan debt relief plan. The Court struck down the proposal...
