BREAKING: Nation shocked to see a president in a room full of children and not sniff any of them 
BREAKING: Democrats warn DOGE that it’s unconstitutional for the federal government to be efficient 
Democrats warn they may never win another election again if Trump shuts down their USAID money laundering operation 
BREAKING: Trump halts Canadian tariffs after Trudeau agrees put “Daddy Trump” on all Canadian currency 
BREAKING: Trump converts all USAID offices into Spirit Halloween stores following shut down 
Dems Pretend to be Excited About Moronic Descendant of Slave Owners That No One Voted For
WASHINGTON, DC—Democrat voter Lou Nee is over the moon to have a chance to vote for someone whose family owned...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
POLL: What’s a good slogan for the Kamala Harris and Pete Buttigieg ticket?
The Harris campaign will be using whatever name is selected in this poll:
BREAKING: White smoke billowing from White House signifies that the Deep State has selected a new puppet to head the government
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a scene reminiscent of the Vatican conclave, white smoke billowed from the chimneys of the White...
FACT CHECK: No, Kamala Harris isn’t offering fellatio to everyone who votes for her
A viral social media post has falsely claimed that Vice President* Kamala Harris is offering fellatio to everyone who votes...
Reasons to vote for Kamala Harris in 2024
Some people think that there are no reasons to vote for Kamala Harris or that the only reason is that...
Not to be outdone by Trump’s sneakers, Kamala Harris releases line of golden knee pads
In a bold move to outshine her political rival, former Vice President Kamala Harris has unveiled her latest venture: a...
Biden Stepping Down ‘Since Assassinating My Opponent Didn’t Work’
In what some Democrats are calling a “stutter” and a “goof”, President* Biden said his main reason for stepping out...
BREAKING: Biden has been informed that he definitely doesn’t want to run for president anymore
WASHINGTON, DC—In a surprising twist, President* Joe Biden has been informed that he no longer wants to run for president...
Crowdstrike CEO: ‘Internet shutdown was successful test run for the real thing coming in November’
AUSTIN—Crowdstrike CEO Shawn Henry has announced that the recent nationwide internet shutdown, which affected voting machines and 911 service, was...
BREAKING: AOC claims that she was nearly killed by news that Trump wasn’t assassinated
WASHINGTON, DC—In a shocking turn of events, Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) has claimed that she was nearly killed by the...
