BREAKING: Congress votes to increase inflation 25% in order to decrease inflation 1%
WASHINGTON, DC—The Senate on Sunday voted to pass H.R. 5376, otherwise known as the "Inflation Reduction Act", 51-50 which will increase inflation...
Joe Biden
BREAKING: Republicans trick Biden into taking a cognition test by telling him it’s a COVID test
WASHINGTON, DC—US House Republicans have been trying to trick President* Joe Biden into taking a cognition test since the oldest...
BREAKING: Biden outlaws attempts to stop the spread of monkeypox as a hate crime
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has outlawed any attempt to try to stop the spread of monkey pox as a hate...
CNN: How Biden finally found and killed Osama bin Laden
WASHINGTON, DC—Before he gave the order to kill notorious terrorist Osama bin Laden, President* Joe Biden wanted to intimately understand what his...
BREAKING: Biden makes ‘State of Emergency’ the 51st state of the Union
WASHINGTON, DC—In an unprecedented move, President* Joe Biden has unilaterally made "State of Emergency" the 51st state of the Union—a...
BREAKING: China threatens to cut Pelosi off from vodka if she lands in Taiwan
BEIJING—A senior official in Beijing has pulled out all the stops in trying to prevent a US Speaker of the...
JUST IN: White House Press Secretary replaced by a literal gaslight
WASHINGTON, DC—After acknowledging the difficulty in constantly gaslighting the American public about everything from the economy to the war in...
Biden Administration Changes the Definition of ‘Dementia’
As Americans continue to question President Biden's mental fitness and competency, the White House proudly announced updates to the Department...
BREAKING: Biden has AOC’s bug eyes surgically implanted to look more alert
WASHINGTON, DC—After much criticism of Biden's squinting and looking half-dead, the president has undergone surgery to implant Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez's eyes...
FACT CHECK: It’s perfectly normal to not blink for several minutes straight
(CNN) WASHINGTON, DC—Several conspiracy theories have emerged following a social media post by President Joe Biden in which he doesn't...
