NASA Announces George Floyd as Backup Crew Member for Artemis III Lunar Landing
Houston, TX – In a bold move to promote inclusivity and “lived experience” in space exploration, NASA confirmed Tuesday that...
George Floyd
Democrats take a break from worshipping a fentanyl-addict as a god to say they don’t want a king
Democrats have briefly stepped away from their hallowed George Floyd shrines—complete with votive candles and murals of dubious artistic merit—to...
MEMORIAL DAY: Nation mourns George Floyd who died when his spaceship exploded in 2020
US—This Memorial Day, the nation is mourning NASA legend George Floyd who died two years ago when his spaceship exploded...
EXCLUSIVE: George Floyd celebrates 5 years of sobriety
MINNEAPOLIS, MN—George Floyd, patron saint of fentanyl, celebrated four consecutive drug-free years today. Mr. Floyd famously quit taking drugs following his...
In Honor Of Black History Month U.S. Treasury Offers Limited Edition Commemorative Fake $20 Bill
In a groundbreaking move to celebrate Black History Month, the U.S. Treasury has announced the release of a limited edition...
NYC to replace Thomas Jefferson statue with a statue of George Floyd robbing a pregnant woman at gunpoint
NEW YORK CITY—In a bold move toward modernizing public spaces, New York City has announced plans to replace the statue...
Biden to replace all statues of white people with statues of George Floyd robbing pregnant woman
US—President* Biden signed an executive order earlier today instructing all municipalities to replace their racist statues of white people with...
BREAKING: Harrison Floyd changes first name to ‘George’ to avoid prosecution by partisan DA
In a stunning and brilliant legal maneuver, Harrison Floyd's attorney changed his first name to George to get our of...
Brave Ukrainian soldier jumps on pile of Russian fentanyl to save fellow soldiers
A brave unknown soldier (pictured above) jumped on a pile of Russian fentanyl to save his fellow soldiers. He will...
BREAKING: Kanye West agrees to settle with Floyd family for $15M; will pay in counterfeit $20 bills
MINNEAPOLIS—Kanye West (Ye) has agreed to settle with the George Floyd family who has sued West for $250 million for...
