BREAKING: Biden makes it illegal to arrest any Person of Color for any crime ever
WASHINGTON, DC—Following the trial of Derek Chauvin who was charged with making George Floyd "eat too many drugs" before getting...
George Floyd
George Floyd Celebrates 300 Days of Sobriety
MINNEAPOLIS, MN—George Floyd, Patron Saint in the Church of Woke, celebrates 300 consecutive drug-free days today. Mr. Floyd famously quit...
NBA to replace ‘all that basketball stuff’ with a 60-minute virtue signaling competition
ORLANDO—The NBA season is set to resume next week in Orlando, Florida, and the league’s court is ready for what...
Tear-gassed protesters discover face masks don’t work
PORTLAND—Thousands of tear-gassed protesters from across the country are discovering that their face masks don't work when they get a...
Disney renames Main St USA George Floyd Blvd; declares it Antifa autonomous zone
ALTA VISTA, FL—Disney has renamed Main Street USA George Floyd Boulevard and declared the surrounding area a communist autonomous zone...
NFL to replace first half of 2020 games with live performance of Hamilton the musical
The NFL, in its latest step amid the national unrest and protests since the May 25 death of George Floyd,...
CHAZ/CHOP protesters back to occupying their parents’ basements again
SEATTLE—After Seattle Mayor Jenny Durkan ruthlessly took back the perfect communist utopia of Capitol Hill Autonomous Zone (CHAZ, also known...
Starbucks serving up newest ‘Self-Loathing’ blond roast
SEATTLE—Starbucks has been working overtime to create their new line of Boutique Roasts to appeal to their newest group of...
Traffic on George Floyd Ave. to flow in the opposite direction of MLK Blvd.
Civil Engineers are having a field day the last few weeks. Not so much regular engineers but the the National...
CNN adds Greta Thunberg to expert panel on ‘What it’s Like Being Black in America’
An upcoming CNN town hall entitled "What it's Like Being Black in America" will feature 17-year-old Swedish activist Greta Thunberg...
