JUST IN: White House Press Secretary replaced by a literal gaslight
WASHINGTON, DC—After acknowledging the difficulty in constantly gaslighting the American public about everything from the economy to the war in...
Joe Biden
Biden Administration Changes the Definition of ‘Dementia’
As Americans continue to question President Biden's mental fitness and competency, the White House proudly announced updates to the Department...
BREAKING: Biden has AOC’s bug eyes surgically implanted to look more alert
WASHINGTON, DC—After much criticism of Biden's squinting and looking half-dead, the president has undergone surgery to implant Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez's eyes...
FACT CHECK: It’s perfectly normal to not blink for several minutes straight
(CNN) WASHINGTON, DC—Several conspiracy theories have emerged following a social media post by President Joe Biden in which he doesn't...
Biden: ‘What we’re seeing is the most diverse, inclusive, and equitable recession in history’
US—President* Joe Biden has addressed the negative GDP growth in consecutive quarters saying, "What we’re seeing is the most diverse,...
BREAKING: Biden accidentally signs executive order doubling all student debt
WASHINGTON, DC—In a rare gaff, President Joe Biden accidentally signed an executive order doubling all student loan debt. "This is...
BREAKING: Biden tests negative for IQ, experiencing mild symptoms
WASHINGTON, DC--President* Joe Biden said Thursday that he's tested negative for IQ but will continue to work while in isolation...
Dollar Tree renamed ‘Buck-Fifty Bush’ amid skyrocketing inflation
US—U.S. inflation surged to a new four-decade high in June because of rising prices for gas, food and rent, squeezing household...
Megan Rapinoe bravely stands on American flag while receiving the Presidential Medal of Honor
WASHINGTON, DC—Soccer player Megan Rapinoe bravely stood on an American flag while receiving the Presidential Medal of Honor from President*...
New FBI Child ID App lets you upload pics of your kids directly to Hunter Biden’s laptop
WASHINGTON, DC—Following the stunning success covering up for President* Joe Biden's son Hunter's laptop full of child pornography, the FBI...
