BREAKING: 23andMe reveals Nancy Pelosi shares 99.97% of her DNA with the Wuhan bat
Have you seen the Wuhan bat? The teeth alone are scary enough but put that together with the rest and...
Year: 2020
CDC releases official ‘contact tracer’ uniform and haircut
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has released the official uniform and haircut for the contact tracer agents...
CNN CEO selects Greta Thunberg to conduct triple bypass surgery on him
CNN CEO, Jeff Zucker, is in need of triple heart bypass surgery and he has selected none other than world-renowned...
Police shoot local dad for violating Justin Trudeau’s finger gun ban
FAIRVIEW, ALBERTA — Following Justin Trudeau's recent ban of 1,500 makes and models of firearms, Canadian officials marked their first...
New border wall now totally impermeable to everything except 2×6″ bricks of every drug known to man
Is it just me or does that wall seem like it's full of holes? Not just a few here and...
BREAKING: Congress repeals 13th Amendment to make all Americans debt slaves
These United States had a program of Mandatory Volunteerism a few hundred years ago. It had a catchy name......hold on........give...
Coronavirus holds press conference to tell us how to keep safe from the government
After months of government press conferences telling the people of the world how to keep safe from coronavirus, Coronavirus has...
BREAKING: Fauci used Chinese fortune cookie lucky numbers in COVID models
Genesius Times has discovered that top US health experts including Dr. Anthony Fauci used the lucky numbers from a local...
As states reopen, Democrats threaten to stay at home and do nothing, just like before COVID
As states across the country set to reopen after the unprecedented COVID-19 shutdown, Democrats have threatened to stay at home...
California spends $14 trillion on police hovercrafts to catch quarantine-breaking surfers
California Governor Gavin Newsom has probably taken the most drastic measures of any state in the world to fight COVID-19....
