Facebook’s new ‘Care-n’ react sends people directly to concentration camps
ST. LOUIS—Facebook users everywhere, especially those named Karen, are excited about a new feature that allows them to report people...
Googly McMooglyface
Billions confident the creator of Windows will protect them from a virus
Billions of people across the globe are waiting with bated breath for the maker of the Windows computer operating system,...
Wildlife reclaiming parks during lockdown: ‘The brontosauruses have quadrupled’
YOSEMITE NATIONAL PARK—Usually, when you drive through Yosemite Village, you have a tough time not running over gnarly rock climbers...
STUDY: Women named Karen derive 83% of life satisfaction from telling people to stay home during COVID crisis
WASHINGTON—In a shocking new CDC study, researchers have found a correlation between being named Karen and deriving an inordinate amount...
Dwayne Wade proud to let his 12-year-old ‘live out his truth’ as a Pterodactyl
Retired NBA star Dwayne Wade remembers exactly what his 12-year-old son said when he came out as transpecies. "We was...
AOC celebrates impeachment results: ‘Trump quitted!’
Minutes after US senators voted to acquit President Trump of the charges brought against him last year, many prominent Democrats...
Iowan Dems scramble to find a candidate who doesn’t actually suck
For over a year, Iowans have hosted campaign stops by over three thousand Democratic presidential hopefuls in effort to prove...
Dems shocked to find their lives still suck after Trump impeachment
Many Democrats are flying high today after the culmination of more than three years’ of partisan work and straw-grasping ended...
Biden hires Jar Jar Binks as new speech writer
In an effort to stay relevant with the people he hopes to command as president, Democratic front runner Joe Biden...
Grown-ass Antifa member forced to return to little kids table for Thanksgiving
A local grown-ass Antifa member was forced to return to the 'little kid table' for Thanksgiving this year due to...
