Bidet 2020: When Crazy People Took All the Toilet Paper
Yes, we made a sweatshirt (and other swag):
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Omar: ‘Trump’s peace deal is racist against terrorists’
MINNEAPOLIS—Not everyone is happy about Trump's advancement of peace relations between Israel and her Arab neighbors. US Representative Ilhan Omar...
CNN: Trump recklessly brings Middle East to brink of peace
(CNN) US President Donald Trump has recklessly brought the Middle East to the brink of peace as United Arab Emirates...
Biden security detail to use only NERF guns from now on
MIAMI—After promising to outlaw assault weapons if elected, presidential nominee Joe Biden is putting his money where his mouth is,...
Netflix corrects problematic ‘Cuties’ by putting Joe Biden in every scene
LOS GATOS, CA—Amid widespread backlash over the provocative film 'Cuties', Netflix has apologized and corrected the problematic content by putting...
Satan buys summer home in California after Newsom makes it just right for him
LOS ANGELES--The fallen angel Lucifer, also known as Satan, has purchased a summer home in California after Governor Gavin Newsom...
Biden: ‘If you’ve never smoked crack, you’re racist’
WILMINGTON—In a new interview with radio show host Charlamagne tha God, Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden stated bluntly, "If you've...
Georgia to open Uyghur concentration camp to lure Disney back to state
ATLANTA—Georgia Governor Brian Kemp has announced a brand new concentration camp for ethnic Uyghurs in an effort to lure the...
Netflix CEO Jerry Epstino defends sexualization of children in ‘Cuties’
LOS GATOS, CA—New Netflix CEO Jerry Epstino has issued a public defense of the new Netflix original film 'Cuties' (“Mignonnes”),...
Oscars now require Best Picture nominees to have at least 1 scene with a living turd
Ahead of the #OscarsSoWhite controversy’s fifth anniversary, the Academy has announced a new set of inclusion requirements films must meet...
