BREAKING: Bondi Promises to Make Up for Not Releasing Epstein Files by Not Releasing Obama Files
Washington, D.C. — U.S. Attorney General Pam Bondi announced Monday that she plans to make amends for her failure to...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Trump Proposes Renaming NFL Commanders Back to “Redskins,” Citing Offense to Commanders-in-Chief
Washington, D.C. — President Donald J. Trump announced Tuesday that he believes the Washington Commanders NFL team should revert to...
Democrats starting to think it was a bad idea to arrest and try to kill Trump
WASHINGTON, DC—Democrats, including Rep. Adam Schiff, are reportedly sweating bullets over their years-long quest to prosecute and politically annihilate former...
WNBA agrees to players’ demand to ‘Pay Us What You Owe Us’; sets all their salaries to $0
PHOENIX — The WNBA has reset all player salaries to $0 following a unified protest during warm-ups at the WNBA...
‘Fetuses are parasites,’ says 34-year-old living in parents’ basement
US—Unemployed Herman Schock, who currently resides in the basement of his parents' house in a suburb of Kansas City, Missouri,...
BREAKING: Trump replaces White House Press Secretary with literal gaslight to address Epstein Files
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a move that has left political analysts and fire marshals equally baffled, former President Donald Trump...
BREAKING: Starmer lowers voting age in UK to ensure everyone in the Tide Pod Challenge Generation can vote
UK—In a bold move to secure the youth vote and cement his legacy as the Prime Minister of Progress, Keir...
BREAKING: Trump considering appointing special prosecutor to cover up the Epstein files
Washington, D.C. — President Donald J. Trump confirmed today that he is “strongly considering” appointing a special prosecutor to manage...
BREAKING: Epstein Island sold to wealthy Middle Eastern businessman Haadid Nahkil Muhssef
NEW YORK—A wealthy Middle Eastern businessman Haadid Nahkil Muhssef has purchased Jeffrey Epstein's pedophile island for $56 million, according to...
BREAKING: Ghislaine Maxwell has tragically committed suicide next week
NEW YORK–In a shocking turn of events, Ghislaine Maxwell, co-conspirator to Jeffrey Epstein, has tragically killed herself next week. Maxwell...
