Guinness World Records awards Mossad for ‘Most Vasectomies at One Time’ surpassing 2024 Democratic Convention
In a ceremony filled with pomp and, ironically, very little circumstance, Guinness World Records awarded the Israeli Mossad the coveted...
Culture
BREAKING: Sean ‘P Diddy’ Combs has tragically committed suicide in Manhattan jail tomorrow
NEW YORK—Sean “Diddy” Combs, the iconic hip-hop mogul, has tragically committed suicide in a Manhattan jail tomorrow. Despite the event...
BREAKING: National touring company has canceled upcoming ‘Cats’ performance in Springfield, Ohio
SPRINGFIELD, OH—In an unprecedented move, the National Touring Company of Cats has canceled its much-anticipated performance in Springfield, Ohio, citing...
Oxford to discontinue “Is the Pope Catholic?” idiom
After several years of questionable Catholicism by Pope Francis, Oxford, publisher of the Official World Idiom Book, has announced it...
LEAKED: Taylor Swift contract to endorse Kamala Harris for $100,000 and lifetime supply of adrenochrome
NEW YORK—A leaked contract has revealed that pop megastar Taylor Swift is allegedly set to endorse Vice President Kamala Harris...
Taylor Swift is growing out her mustache and armpit hair until Trump is taken off the 2024 ballot
NEW YORK—In a bold move, pop sensation Taylor Swift has announced that she will not shave her mustache or armpit...
AOC hosts ‘Cooking with Communism’, shows you how to cook your pets
The new smash hit social video show "Cooking with Communism" stars democratic socialist Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who takes questions while...
NFL to expand diversity and inclusion by holding one Super Bowl for Blacks and another for Whites
In a groundbreaking move aimed at promoting diversity and inclusivity, the National Football League (NFL) has announced plans to host...
Kamala Harris orders Secret Service to use only NERF guns from now on
WASHINGTON, DC—Call her a power-hungry prostitute or a tyrannical communist, but you cannot call President Vice-President Kamala Harris a hypocrite...
Refusing migrants is a ‘grave sin’ says Pope Francis from inside his walled fortress
VATICAN CITY – Speaking from the safety of the Vatican's towering walls, Pope Francis delivered a powerful sermon this week,...
