BREAKING: The ‘Free Palpatine’ movement spreads across the US
In a bizarre and slightly humorous twist, a peculiar movement known as the "Free Palpatine" campaign has been gaining ground...
Culture
2024 Burning Man Festival moves to outside NYC courthouse during Trump hush money trial
NEW YORK—Organizers of Burning Man 2024 have announced that this year's festival will take place on the steps of the...
Vogue unveils shocking cover featuring Zelensky embracing new wife Mike Johnson
In a surprising turn of events, Vogue has just released its newest cover featuring the unexpected pairing of Ukrainian President...
Gavin Newsom threatens to blot out the sun again if we don’t sacrifice a million babies to climate goddess Greta Thunberg this year
SACRAMENTO—California Governor Gavin Newsom has issued an ultimatum to the world: sacrifice 1 million babies to climate goddess Greta Thunberg...
RIP Karine “Wanda” Jean-Pierre
In loving memory of Karine Jean-Pierre, also known as "Wanda', the dynamic and unforgettable actress who stole our hearts on...
BREAKING: Don Lemon marries notorious terrorist and ‘biggest threat to America’
NEW YORK CITY—Former CNN anchor Don Lemon has announced his marriage to notorious terrorist and "biggest threat to America," Tim...
BREAKING: pictures of Michelle Obama pregnant have been discovered
MARTHA'S VINEYARD, MA—In a stunning revelation that has sent shockwaves through the political and social landscape, it has been discovered...
BREAKING: April Fool’s Day cancelled because reality is so ridiculous
US President* Joe Biden has cancelled the national holiday April Fool's Day due to severe competition from the ridiculousness of...
Biden to hang 6 Easter Bunnies in honor of Trans Visibility Day
WASHINGTON, DC—In a shocking turn of events, President Joe Biden has announced that he will be personally hanging six Easter...
Biden wishes everyone a ‘Merry Thanksgiving!’
WASHINGTON, DC—President Joe Biden has inadvertently confused the nation by wishing everyone a "Merry Thanksgiving" on Easter Sunday. The gaffe,...
