BREAKING: Dozens of fat ugly women won’t have sex with you until you support killing babies
US—Following the leak of the SCOTUS decision overturning Roe v Wade, many brave and entirely unattractive feminists have taken to...
Health
Biden’s FDA bans Juul from selling e-cigarettes; approves them selling crack instead
WASHINGTON, DC—A new report says that the Food and Drug Administration is planning to cut off Juul e-cigarettes from the...
BREAKING: SARS-CoV-2 has finally met its maker
Dr. Anthony Fauci, the nation’s leading infectious disease creator, tested positive for COVID-19 Wednesday. Fauci, 81, tested positive on a rapid...
Fauci abruptly changes course on Ivermectin, Remdesivir after contracting COVID
WASHINGTON, DC—Dr. Anthony Fauci has reversed course on the drugs Ivermectin and Remdesivir after he contracted COVID this week. Until...
To fight racism, WHO will rename monkeypox ‘honkeypox’
The World Health Organization said Tuesday it will rename the monkeypox virus after concern that it could stoke racism and stigma. The...
Burger King releases new gay burger topped with monkeypox or AIDS
Burger King wants its customers to be fully immersed in Pride this year by releasing their new Gay Whoppers, which...
Bill Gates releases new book ‘I Want to Kill Half of You’
SEATTLE—Bill Gates recently released his new book, "I Want to Kill Half of You," in which he offers some insightful observations...
Bill Gates releases Windows OS for humans: ‘MonkeySoft’ Vista
SEATTLE—While Bill Gates officially has left the Windows board to focus on bioterrorism, he has returned briefly for a release...
