Fauci: You must give yourself a swirly to prevent catching the coronavirus
Are you prepared to do your part in combating the coronavrius epidemic? The esteemed expert of immunology and overlord of...
Health
Big Tech makes sure you only hear from health experts like Bill Gates, not ignorant frontline doctors
WASHINGTON DC--A video featuring medical professionals from a group called America’s Frontline Doctors, in which they tout the benefits of...
Local man eaten by plant that grew from mysterious Chinese seeds
PROVO, UT—A local man, Harry S. Truman (no relation to the president), was eaten alive by the plant that grew...
Fauci: ‘Face masks aren’t necessary if you put your hands like this’
WASHINGTON—Tippy top infectious disease expert and America's doctor, Dr. Anthony Fauci has released new guidelines for wearing masks in public...
Cuomo: ‘Pizza is a substantive food unless you put pineapple on it’
NEW YORK—Governor Andrew Cuomo, in a lengthy explanation of possibly the most arbitrary government mandate in the long history arbitrary...
Planned Parenthood will only abort black babies from now on to support Black Lives Matter
In solidarity with the social justice movement Black Lives Matter, Planned Parenthood Corporation will only abort black babies going forward....
Tear-gassed protesters discover face masks don’t work
PORTLAND—Thousands of tear-gassed protesters from across the country are discovering that their face masks don't work when they get a...
CDC admits to using Common Core math to add up new COVID cases
ATLANTA—The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) have admitted to using Common Core math to add up new COVID...
Newsom mandates leather face masks so Californians can literally lick boots while being bootlickers
SACRAMENTO—Gov. Gavin Newsom has issued a statewide order mandating that all Californians wear leather face masks while in public or...
Bill Gates infuriated that they keep coming up with cheap cures to his coronavirus bioweapon
REDMOND, WA—Billionaire and Bond Supervillain Bill Gates is incresingly infuriated that doctors and health practitioners keep coming up with simple...
