Cuomo says he was too busy killing 15,000 seniors to do anything bad like sexually harass someone
ALBANY, NY—Governor Andrew Cuomo has offered a unique defense against the myriad sexual assault allegations that have been raised against...
Politics
Congress passes law requiring all bills to be at least 10,000 pages long
WASHINGTON, DC—Congress passed a law today requiring that all future bills be at least 10,000 pages long. “We want all...
Biden calls up National Guard to protect against the growing threat of Dr. Seuss
WASHINGTON, DC—President Biden has called up the National Guard to protect the entire country against the vicious new threat of...
Biden gets largest crowd ever at border rally
(CNN) President Joe Biden must be getting really popular. Everyone must love his long list of executive orders and new...
BREAKING: Texas declares each Californian 3/5th of a person
AUSTIN, TX—Texas Gov. Gregg Abbott signed an executive order today declaring Californians in his state three-fifths of a person. “I...
Woman with ‘My Body My Choice’ shirt freaks out about Texas ending mask mandate
AUSTIN—A woman with a “My Body My Choice” shirt has been stationed at the Texas governor's mansion screaming at Governor...
POLL: 86% of Dead Voters Already Regret Voting for Biden
Dominion-elect President Joe Biden's approval rating plummeted among one of Democrat's most reliable voter base, the dead.The survey released Tuesday...
Biden cancels Dr. Seuss after repeatedly failing ‘The Cat’s Quizzer’
WASHINGTON, DC—President Biden has canceled Dr. Seuss after repeatedly failing "The Cat's Quizzer" trivia book. "That stuff is really hard...
Biden replaces Women’s History Month with Transwomen’s History Month
WASHINGTON, DC—In his latest brave executive order, President Biden has eliminated Women's History Month and replaced it with Transwomen's History...
Cuomo wins Al-Qaeda’s ‘Jihadi of the Year’ prize for killing 3x more Americans than 9/11
MIDDLE EAST—Emmy winner and New York Governor Andrew Cuomo scored another award this week as Al-Qaeda honored him with their...
