Joe “Smash” Biden rejects pre-debate test: ‘no reason to suspect I take any drugs’
WILMINGTON, DE- Presidential candidate Joe Biden has refused to honor President Donald Trump's request for debate participants to take a...
Politics
BREAKING: Biden pulls out of debates unless they provide several nap breaks
CLEVELAND—US Presidential Candidate Joe Biden says he won't debate President Trump unless there are ample nap breaks during the grandest...
Biden switches VP from Kamala to pro ‘deal maker’ Wayne Brady
Presidential hopeful Joe Biden campaign officials confirmed the switch from Kamala Harris to Let's Make a Deal host, Wayne Brady....
Newsom signs executive order releasing prison inmates who don’t ‘identify’ as a criminals
SACRAMENTO—California Gov. Gavin Newsom (D) signed an executive order Saturday allowing inmates to be released from prison immediately if they don't "identify" as a...
BREAKING: Jill Biden arrested for elderly abuse
WILMINGTON, DE—After months of forcing her senior-citizen husband Joe Biden into the public spotlight despite his declining cognitive inabilities, Jill...
BREAKING: Trump SCOTUS pick Barrett tried pineapple on her pizza in college
(CNN)—Leading congressional Democrats are calling for the withdrawal of President Trump's Supreme Court nominee Amy Coney Barrett after evidence has...
Senate Democrats prepare SCOTUS nominee Amy Barrett for questioning
Democratic senators on the Senate Judiciary Committee have chucked their white suits and dresses for more appropriate attire, wearing Roman...
China pinky-promises to lower carbon emissions by 2069
BEIJING—Xi Jinping and all of his advisors have pinky-promised to lower their country’s emissions by the year 2069. The promise...
All food packaging to feature at least one Obama from now on
The Mars company announced today they are 'Racist No More' and have signed Barack Obama to replace the outdated Uncle...
Biden says his white supremacy is okay because he ‘is black’
WORSCHESTER, PA—Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden says that his white supremacy is "okay" because he is black. "C'mon man! You...
