BREAKING: Democrats vote to remove Southern states from US for ties to slavery
WASHINGTON DC—In a shocking and unprecedented move, congressional Democrats have voted to remove Southern states from the Union for their...
World
Time: Biden taking on stairs
Did you catch a wiff of the new Time cover? Those aviators! "On his way to meet Vladimir Putin, Secret...
BREAKING: Biden declares Branch Covidians official state religion; will persecute non-believers
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden, in conjunction with the future President* Kamala Harris, has declared that Fauciism is the new state...
BREAKING: Guatamala deports Kamala Harris
GUATAMALA CITY—Immigration authorities in Guatamala have deported an annoying American named Kamala Harris. She will be extradited to Mexico, where...
Kamala Harris flies 10-truck caravan to Guatamala to lecture them on climate change
GUATAMALA CITY—Vice President* Kamala Harris flew a 10-Suburban caravan to Guatamala in order to lecture them on climate change. "It...
Man who bought 1 million acres of arctic tundra for post-warming golf course wants money back
Qaqortoq, Greenland—Charlie Natt, a Berkeley, CA resident is suing Donald Trump and "all the Republicans" after his Arctic Circle real...
Lightfoot launches ‘shots for shots’ program to increase vaccination among gang bangers
CHICAGO—Mayor Lori Lightfoot has launched a new program called "shots for shots" to increase COVID-19 vaccination rates among Chicago's gang...
Iran scuttles navy ship Kharg after learning it was gay
The Muslim dictatorship formally known as Persia is still supporting proxy wars around the world, and persecuting Christians, for which...
Pride parade cancelled due to 90% chance of fire and brimstone
A pride parade scheduled to be held on Saturday in the twin cities of Sodom and Gomorrah has been cancelled...
Genesius Times issues apology to China
Much has been said about the apology that John Cena made after he accidentally said that Taiwan was a country....
