Greta Thunberg threatens to release more coronavirus to further lower global CO2

While Bill Gates has been disappointed that his population control coronavirus hasn’t killed off as many people as he had hoped, global climate change alarmists are very pleased with the results of the outbreak.

Businesses are closing their doors at least temporarily and some shuttering altogether. Over a quarter of China’s economy is shut down due to fears of coronavirus. As a result, temperatures are plummeting across China, Asia, and the Middle East. People are staying at home. Both private and public transportation has come to a standstill.

Already much of China is covered in ice and ocean waters have begun to freeze. Many are predicting an ice bridge between Japan and Baja California. In fact, Sarah Palin can not only see Russia from her backyard but can now take a snowmobile and visit.

The Global Warming Community is now planning to release massive amounts of CO2 into the atmosphere to mitigate this deep freeze by taking as many cans and bottles of soda as they can find, shaking them vigorously and opening them in unison. And where is Greta Thunberg? Right in the thick of it, popping as many tops as she can.

Scientists claim it may be too late for even this to mitigate what is now known as “Ice Bucket Corona”, or ” The 5 for $10 during Happy Hour Climate Apocalypse”

Americans, however, may well be spared, as the hot air released by Democratic Presidential Candidates should be more than adequate to offset the dramatic temperature drops. As more of this story ‘slips’ out GT will shovel as much news as we can to our readers.