BREAKING: Democrats unveil bold new ‘Peace is War’ campaign in support of endless Ukraine conflict 
AOC horrified terrorists are running over people with gas-powered cars instead of electric vehicles 
CNN: More cars mysteriously drive themselves into German pedestrians 
Bondi assures Americans: ‘Epstein files coming soon—just need to blot out all the Israeli connections first’ 
Zelensky launches new reality TV show: Dancing with the Tsars in bold war-fundraising effort 
Nation starting to think appointing someone Transportation Secretary just because he’s gay isn’t such a good idea
US—People across the country are starting to think that appointing someone as Transportation Secretary because he's gay isn't such a...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
BREAKING: Local college grad can’t even
Being a female college grad in today's society is a real rollercoaster ride. From avocado toast to rose-colored glasses, we've...
After deadly Ohio train derailment, Transportation Sec Buttigieg vows to go on train vacation next
EAST PALESTINE, OH—Following the deadly train derailment in Ohio in which hundreds of thousands of pounds of toxic chemicals were...
BREAKING: Eagles win Super Bowl LVII after scoring 6 TDs at 4 am when no one was watching
PHOENIX—The Philadelphia Eagles, along with the rest of the world, thought they had lost Super Bowl LVII when they went...
Top Predictions for this Year’s Super Bowl
Today is Super Bowl LVII, whatever those numbers mean. I have no clue and neither do you, so stop pretending...
Local retiree searches ‘Google’ on Google to use Google to google something
In today's fast-paced digital world, it's easy to get lost in the sea of information available on the internet. But...
Why Women Need to Stop Pretending to Know Everything
Ladies, it's time to come clean: we don't know everything. Yes, you heard that right. Despite what society has been...
Biden only needed 3 shots of adrenochrome to stay up this late
WASHINGTON, DC--America can rest easy. We are in good hands. If you were worried about the mental and physical health...
BREAKING: President Biden Utters First Fully Coherent Sentence of His Presidency
UNITED STATES—President Biden broke a record today after uttering his first fully coherent sentence of his presidency. The sentence? “Why...
