Donald Trump picks Elizabeth Warren to head Bureau of Indian Affairs 
Outgoing Transportation Sec. Pete Buttigieg taps P. Diddy for mission to destroy Uranus 
BREAKING: Biden Sneaks in Pardon for Hunter During Annual Turkey Pardon Ceremony 
Farewell, X: Why I’m Leaving Over Their Refusal to Censor Me 
Bernie declares eating $6.2 million duct-taped bananas a human right to be paid for by government 
BREAKING: AOC Barely Survives Murder Attempt by Maskless Neil Gorsuch
WASHINGTON, DC—Supreme Court Justice Neil Gorsuch remains at large after a blatant attempt to assassinate Congresswoman and January 6 hero,...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
After being caught with locket of hair in mask, White House confirms Biden’s sniffing addiction
(CNN) The White House today has confirmed President* Joe Biden's hair sniffing addiction after he was caught with a locket...
BREAKING: Virginia’s new governor supports full facial nudity at schools
RICHMOND, VA—Virginia's new Republican governor, Glenn Youngkin, supports full facial nudity at schools from Kindergarten up to high school, according...
Modern Fuhrer magazine ranks top Hitlers of 2022; Hitler comes in 5th, George Washington still #1
Modern Fuhrer magazine’s new Hitlers Ranked poll finds George Washington is still in first place, surprisingly, Hitler himself has dropped...
Millions of Americans Spend MLK-Day Claiming MLK Supported Their Political Party
In remembrance of Martin Luther King Jr., online activists are spending their MLK-Day arguing that Doctor King was a fierce...
Virginia’s new governor recklessly allows children to breathe freely all day
(CNN) We knew it would be bad, but we didn't know it would be this bad. Virginia's new Republican Governor...
Biden changes name to Emperor Palbiden, establishes Galactic Empire
WASHINGTON, DC—In a rare press conference, President* Biden said that he has officially changed his name to Emperor Palbiden and...
Biden to build new border wall to protect Americans from ‘American’ts’
Washington D.C. - “There’s good walls and there’s bad walls.” President Joe Biden announced last night at a fund raiser...
Greta Thunberg screams at Tonga volcano recklessly violating climate change regulation
TONGA—Just a day after Time Magazine named her "Person of the Year," Greta Thunberg was fighting climate change, this time...
Biden deploys 2 AT-ATs to defend White House against ‘rebel scum’
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Biden has deployed two All Terrain Armored Transport (AT-AT) vehicles to the White House to defend against "rebel...
