‘Trump Can’t Buy Me for $5,000,’ Says Local Man Who Got Experimental Jab for a Free Donut 
AOC Asks How 9/11 Victims ‘Died in Alphabetical Order’ During Memorial Reading 
Yes, Black Lives Matter… Unless They Disagree with Liberals 
9/11 Drone Show to Recreate Perfectly Intact Hijacker Passport Escaping Fiery Inferno 
NCAA Rules Michigan May Keep Playing Until They Win 
Netflix corrects problematic ‘Cuties’ by putting Joe Biden in every scene
LOS GATOS, CA—Amid widespread backlash over the provocative film 'Cuties', Netflix has apologized and corrected the problematic content by putting...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Trump accuses Woodward of white privilege for not doing the interview in blackface
It's pretty hard to put one over on the Trumpster. He's a 'new yawka fergodsakes'. And from Queens no less....
AOC scrambles for something even stupider to say to draw attention from Joe Biden
BRONX, NY—US Congressman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) announced on Twitch that she is feeling depressed lately because the media is paying...
Satan buys summer home in California after Newsom makes it just right for him
LOS ANGELES--The fallen angel Lucifer, also known as Satan, has purchased a summer home in California after Governor Gavin Newsom...
Elon Musk claims his 2025 Model 3 Neuralink vehicles will run on ‘Wishful Thinking’
Elon Musk has been working on his Neuralink system for decades. He now claims he can cure anxiety, depression, hangovers,...
Biden: ‘If you’ve never smoked crack, you’re racist’
WILMINGTON—In a new interview with radio show host Charlamagne tha God, Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden stated bluntly, "If you've...
Biden supporters set fire to their homes in solidarity with rioters
PORTLAND, OR—They say an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. That has now been proven beyond a...
Georgia to open Uyghur concentration camp to lure Disney back to state
ATLANTA—Georgia Governor Brian Kemp has announced a brand new concentration camp for ethnic Uyghurs in an effort to lure the...
Netflix CEO Jerry Epstino defends sexualization of children in ‘Cuties’
LOS GATOS, CA—New Netflix CEO Jerry Epstino has issued a public defense of the new Netflix original film 'Cuties' (“Mignonnes”),...
NFL plays anthem for every ethnicity on Earth before first game to promote unity
In response to the increased racial tension in America, the NFL opened its first game with the white national anthem,...
