Jaguar introduces new car to match its new ad campaign 
BREAKING: I was raped by whoever Trump selects for one of his cabinet positions 
BREAKING: Elon Musk buys MSNBC to constantly air video of Alex Jones giving Morning Joe and Mika noogies 
CNN: Startled by Loud Noises, President Kennedy Trips and Falls in Limousine 
This Day In Mostly-Peaceful History: President Kennedy Goes Scenic Ride through Dallas 
Greta Thunberg has been named Time’s Puppet of the Year for 2019
16-year-old Swedish environmental activist Greta Thunberg has been named Time's Puppet of the Year for 2019. The magazine said that...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Elizabeth Warren will wear scarf drenched with the blood of aborted fetuses to her inauguration
Massachusetts senator and Democrat presidential contender Elizabeth Warren told a crowd during a campaign stop Monday that she intends to...
Suckers now born every 11.9 seconds: scientist
A sucker is now born every 11.9 seconds, a new study in Science shows. “Americans who haven’t opened a book...
Bernie declares eating $120k duct-taped bananas a human right to be paid for by government
Italian artist Maurizio Cattelan recently sold a banana duct-taped to a white wall for $120,000 at Miami's Art Basel museum,...
BREAKING: First living turd named Time Person of the Year
Chet, climate activist abd Congress's first living turd, has been name Time Magazine's Person of the Year for 2019. "He...
Jerry Nadler surgically adds bionic arms to maintain impeachment hearing gavel banging
Chair of the United States Congress Judiciary Committee Jerrold Nadler (Democrat, New York, 10th Congressional District) is being worn out...
Trump creates single-payer Dept. of Movies with a max actor salary of $50,000 a year
In response to consistent pleas for socialist policies from Hollywood actors, President Trump has created a Soviet-style single-payer Department of...
Adam Schiff eyed to defend Hunter Biden in child negligence case
With the recent court ruling that Hunter Biden & Lunden Alexis Roberts must turn over 5 years of financial records,...
BREAKING: Nadler rushed to hospital for heart attack; cured by loosening belt buckle
Representative Jerrold Nadler who has been a key player in the impeachment of Donald Trump was rushed to the hospital...
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez unveils plan for free 100% renewable electricity for all
Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez announced her vision for a Green New Deal, including, shockingly, that every American must hold their breath...
