Jaguar introduces new car to match its new ad campaign 
BREAKING: I was raped by whoever Trump selects for one of his cabinet positions 
BREAKING: Elon Musk buys MSNBC to constantly air video of Alex Jones giving Morning Joe and Mika noogies 
CNN: Startled by Loud Noises, President Kennedy Trips and Falls in Limousine 
This Day In Mostly-Peaceful History: President Kennedy Goes Scenic Ride through Dallas 
Nike introduces replacement for offensive Betsy Ross flag shoe
International sweat shop proprietor and athletic shoe manufacturer Nike was berated for releasing a shoe with a historic Betsy Ross...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
AOC stumbles into grocery store deodorant aisle, is rattled by the horrors of capitalism
AOC's day started like any other. The hashtagtavist turned progressive darling logged some important hours in front of her Twitter...
Trump gains liberal support by renaming ICE ‘Planned Citizenship’
In an appeal to pro-choice progressives protesting the detention center at the Mexican border, President Trump has renamed the US...
Julian Castro travels time, teaches mom about ‘reproductive justice’, inexplicably disappears
Well, the extremely crowded Democratic presidential field has suddenly gotten a little thinner. Julian Castro, the most woke candidate by...
Following successful Pride Month, lazy Americans name July Sloth Month
After what some commentators are calling “the gayest month ever”, advocates around the country are hoping to promote their own...
Woke Sysco employees protest sale of food to border detention camp
Super-woke employees at Sysco's Boston headquarters left their offices Wednesday afternoon to protest the company's sale of more than $200,000...
Obama appalled that Trump is getting all the credit for his border detention centers
Former President Barack Obama said that he was appalled that current President Donald Trump is getting all the credit for...
Facebook suspends popular Goose Page, says “Honks are Hate Speech”
The hammer hath been dropped. African goose enthusiats the world over have now been warned. Their hate will not be...
Liberals take break from celebrating abortion to mourn the death of immigrant children
It takes a major crisis to divert the attention of liberals away from praising the killing of innocent human babies,...
Democrats send taxpayers $87 trillion bill for all the ‘free’ stuff they promised in 2 hour debate
Democrats sent an $87 trillion bill to American taxpayers for everything they promised in a generous auction-style debate the last...
