BREAKING: Nation shocked to see a president in a room full of children and not sniff any of them 
BREAKING: Democrats warn DOGE that it’s unconstitutional for the federal government to be efficient 
Democrats warn they may never win another election again if Trump shuts down their USAID money laundering operation 
BREAKING: Trump halts Canadian tariffs after Trudeau agrees put “Daddy Trump” on all Canadian currency 
BREAKING: Trump converts all USAID offices into Spirit Halloween stores following shut down 
Dad of gay teen fondly recalls time when real men only feared daughters getting pregnant
Oh, the good ol' days when men were men and women were women, and boys didn't compete in girl competitions...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Texas Rep Joaquin Castro denies relation to dictator Fidel Castro after using all his tactics
SAN ANTONIO, TX—In a statement Thursday, Texas Rep. Joaquin Castro said that he definitely wasn't Fidel Castro's nephew even though...
Liberal confused as to why no one was able to defend himself in his gun-free zone mass shooting
Local liberal Nathan Fizzle is completely flummoxed. After a mass shooting last year, he thought he had the solution: he...
OPINION: It’s time to fire Tucker Carlson for killing the last wild Triceratops
#FireTuckerCarlson is trending and I'm totally in support of it but not because of why other people think he should...
Enlightened progressive recycles platitude ‘Prayers won’t change anything’ for the 278th time this year
Cue the eye-rolls. In the wake of tragedy, a nation full of people capable of doing little more than praying,...
20 killed in Chicago shootings over weekend but there was no racist manifesto so no one cares
CHICAGO – At least 72 people were shot, including 12 fatally, over the weekend in Chicago, another eruption of violence in a city that...
St. Louis man dismayed to learn that he’s actually a Russian bot
Jerry Franklin was just going about his morning as usual, sipping his coffee, checking email, correcting people on the Internet,...
Nation relieved to learn the horrific racist mass shooting was actually just a false flag by the Deep State
Millions we're horrified by the blatant racism of a lone gunman shooting up an El Paso Walmart targeting Latino Americans...
Notorious welfare queens proceed to lecture Americans about right and wrong
Nobody saw this coming. Google, tech overlord the world over, having made billions turning taxpayer money into infrastructure and search...
Facebook’s sanctions now include labeling platform offenders with scarlet “A”
In an attempt to ‘moderate the hate’ on their platform, Facebook has rolled out a novel punishment for repeat offenders....
