Jaguar introduces new car to match its new ad campaign 
BREAKING: I was raped by whoever Trump selects for one of his cabinet positions 
BREAKING: Elon Musk buys MSNBC to constantly air video of Alex Jones giving Morning Joe and Mika noogies 
CNN: Startled by Loud Noises, President Kennedy Trips and Falls in Limousine 
This Day In Mostly-Peaceful History: President Kennedy Goes Scenic Ride through Dallas 
Arsonist changes name to ‘Climate Change’ so that people can say Climate Change causes wildfires
MAUI, HI—An arsonist who has started several fires in Hawaii, Oregon, and California has legally changed his name to "Climate...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Intelligence Officials say Trump likely colluded with Russia to make Joe Biden accept millions of dollars in bribe money
In a stunning revelation that has left political analysts scratching their heads, a group of unnamed "intelligence officials" has come...
BREAKING: FBI kills man because he made threats to a president who isn’t Trump
In a bizarre case of mistaken presidential identity, the FBI has reportedly taken swift action by eliminating a man who...
Biden Department of Justice officially changes name to ‘Department of Just Us’
WASHINGTON, DC—The President* Biden Department of Justice has officially changed its name to the US Department of Just Us, according...
US Women’s Soccer Team promises to win next World Cup by replacing all the women with high school boys
In an unexpected twist to boost their chances at the next World Cup, the US Women's Soccer Team has unveiled...
BREAKING: Biden makes campaign stop at Delaware cemetery
In a bold move that defies all traditional campaign strategies, President Joe Biden has been spotted hitting the campaign trail...
NOAA Says Next Tropical Storm To Be Transgender, Will Be Called “Tropical Storm They/Them”
WASHINGTON, DC—The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration – NOAA – said on Friday that the next tropical storm will be...
DOJ Indicts Every President Since George Washington For Being Near the Capitol on Jan. 6
WASHINGTON, DC—The Department of Justice has issued an indictment for every president since George Washington for being near the Capitol...
Here Are All the Crimes Donald Trump is Being Indicted For
WASHINGTON, DC— A federal grand jury in Washington, D.C., has indicted former President Donald Trump in the criminal investigation into...
Republicans Promise To Finally Impeach Biden In 2048
WASHINGTON, DC—In light of the endless corruption of the Biden family, Congressional Republicans promised that they’re very close to impeaching...
