BREAKING: COVID-19 has died after infecting Chuck Norris at age 81
DALLAS—COVID-19, the novel coronavirus, which has wrecked havoc across the globe, has been declared dead after infecting Chuck Norris. "We...
Joe Biden
BREAKING: Colin Powell to expose Clinton Foundation fraud tomorrow
WASHINGTON, DC—While former Secretary of State Colin Powell said he voted for Clinton in 2020, he has since learned of...
BREAKING: Virginia legalizes rapes by men who wear skirts
RICHMOND, VA—Governor Ralph Northam signed the most progressive sexual assault bill in the country today as Virginia legalized rapes for...
CNN: Biden draws huge boat parade off California coast
(CNN) LOS ANGELES—While there wasn't much support for President* Joe Biden during his campaign, the first Alzheimer's patient in the...
BREAKING: Jon Gruden identifies as Hunter Biden so media will ignore his emails
LAS VEGAS—Jon Gruden has identified as President* Biden's son Hunter Biden so that the media will ignore his offensive emails,...
Biden praises Lightfoot for how many Chicagoans have ‘gotten shot’ this year
CHICAGO—In a rambling, incoherent speech, the most popular president in the history of the world pushed his vaccine agenda in...
Local woman fired for refusing to put something in her body against her will
A local woman, Lauren Preston, says she was fired by her employer for refusing to put something into her body...
Biden taps Weinstein to lead ‘Jobs for Jabs’ program citing his experience putting things into people’s bodies for them to get work
WASHINGTON, DC—US President* Joe Biden has appointed famous Hollywood producer Harvey Weinstein to lead his new "Jab for a Job"...
Breaking WELY News Update
The US government is collapsing and we’re pretending it’s not! All in the latest news update! Stay current on the...
Biden narrowly misses price of the $3.5 trillion budget on Price is Right by $3.5 trillion
BURBANK, California—Joe Biden narrowly missed the correct price on a $3.5 trillion budget on the Price is Right today, guessing...
