Millions of satire writers mourn the announcement of Beto ending presidential campaign
Millions of satire writers across the country are mourning the announcement that former Texas congressman Robert "Beto" O'Rourke is dropping...
Robert Beto O’Rourke
Mexican government hires Beto to confiscate all the drug cartel guns
MEXICO CITY—Last week, hundreds of gunmen from the Sinaloa cartel overpowered military forces in fighting that killed at least a...
Cultural appropriation for Halloween forbidden unless you’re a Democratic presidential candidate
In an effort to curb illicit cultural appropriation during this Halloween season, the city of Des Moines, Iowa has banned...
Beto threatens to let you keep your guns and money if he doesn’t win the 2020 nomination
Robert "Beto" O'Rourke has threatened to let you keep your guns and money if he doesn't win the 2020 Democratic...
Sheikh O’Rourke vows to impose jizya tax on gay marriage opponents
During a town hall hosted by CNN, the venerable sheikh Beto O’Rourke explained his plan for bringing critics of the...
Beto doubles down: will replace US nuclear weapons with NERF darts as president
After a shocking series of events, Democratic hopeful Robert "Beto" O'Rourke has doubled down on his anti-gun stance. The former...
Beto’s security detail to use only NERF guns from now on
Call him what you may, a joke, a puppet, or vanilla Obama, but you can't call Robert "Beto" O'Rourke a...
Beto gun grab to start with water gun confiscation from each and every child
During last Thursday’s presidential debate, former Texas congressman Robert "Beto" O'Rourke said, “Hell yes, we’re going to take your AR-15, your...
Beto O’Rourke named prestigious AR-15 Salesman of the Year
Democratic presidential hopeful Robert "Beto" O'Rourke was just named the prestigious Armalite AR-15 salesman of the year, an honor that...
British troops triggered by ‘Come and Take it’ flag, condemn it as hate speech
The British are coming... to say they were triggered by the guerilla revolutionaries of the American Founding. It all started...
