BREAKING: Thousands of immigrants heading to US to become victims of systemic racism
McALLEN, TX—A migrant caravan from Africa and Central America is heading for the United States to become victims of the...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Disney releases new blockbuster: Ocacchio
NO BUENO VISTA, CA—Disney Corporation is capitalizing on the wonderful life of congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (also known as Alexandria Ocasio-Smollett)...
BREAKING: Biden ends mass discussion about ‘Kids in cages’
THE BORDER—The great humanitarian Joe Biden has overturned the horrible Trump immigration policy of "kids in cages" that the Obama...
Groundhog Day: Fauci sees his shadow so there will be 6 more weeks of quarantine
PUNXSUTAWNEY, PA—Anthony Fauci saw his shadow Tuesday, predicting six more weeks of quarantine. No one can question the veracity of...
BREAKING: Biden threatens to stop Iran’s nuclear weapon program by giving them $180 billion
WASHINGTON, DC—In a show of foreign policy muscle, President Joe Biden threatened to stop the progressing Iranian nuclear weapon program...
Biden to keep troops in DC forever to make sure it doesn’t look like a military coup
WASHINGTON, DC—Josef Stealin Biden will keep the National Guard troops stationed around the nation's capital there until March in order...
POLL: Most people unimpressed with their 2-week free trial of the New World Order
A poll conducted by the Pew Pew Institute shows that a majority of Americans are unimpressed with their 2-week free...
AOC claims Starbucks tried to kill her by misspelling her name on her to-go coffee
WASHINGTON, DC—US Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) is living a nightmare in the hellscape that is the nation's capital. Not only...
Walmart now offering free COVID anal swabs before shopping
BENTONVILLE, AR—In the interest of making the shopping experience for everyone as safe as can be, Walmart Supercenters will now...
Local girls HS team gets new recruit after Biden signs trans rights executive order
The local girls high school basketball team got a surprise new recruit following President Biden's new transgender rights executive order...
