Exavier Saskagoochie

Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!

Cuomo blames his pen for making him sign nursing home order that killed thousands

Exavier Saskagoochie February 16, 2021 0

NEW YORK—Governor Andrew Cuomo has accepted the responsibility of blaming his pen for making him sign the nursing home order,...

Donald Trump is the first back-to-back impeachment champion ever

Exavier Saskagoochie February 13, 2021 0

WASHINGTON, DC—There has never been a two-time, let alone a back-to-back impeachment champion until now. Donald Trump has defeated the...

Local dad finally gets a rest after exhausting week of turning off the lights for everyone else

Exavier Saskagoochie February 13, 2021 0

Local father of five adorable munchkins, Peter Bougereaux was finally able to rest on the couch this evening after an...

BREAKING: Joe Biden gets stuck sniffing woman who used Gorilla Glue for hairspray

Exavier Saskagoochie February 12, 2021 0

BATON ROUGE, LA—TikToker Tessica Brown thought she had seen the end of her problems after uploading a video in which...

Disney gives all princesses a brave makeover to fight wrongthink

Exavier Saskagoochie February 11, 2021 0

VISTA DE MAL, CA—In its campaign to fight wrongthink, Disney has given all of their celebrated princesses a stunning and...

BREAKING: The Dallas Mavericks secede from the United States

Exavier Saskagoochie February 11, 2021 0

DALLAS—NBA team the Dallas Mavericks, led by owner Mark Cuban, have seceded from the United States. Cuban on Tuesday told...

To be more inclusive, Disney fires only woman on ‘The Mandalorian’

Exavier Saskagoochie February 11, 2021 0

VISTA DEL MAL, CA—In an effort to be more inclusive, Disney has fired Gina Carano, the only female on their...

Dems schedule impeachment for every past and future Republican president

Exavier Saskagoochie February 10, 2021 0

WASHINGTON, DC—Following the successful trial of former president Donald Trump, House Democrats have scheduled impeachment proceedings for every past and...

BREAKING: Trump replaces impeachment team with Zoom call cat lawyer

Exavier Saskagoochie February 9, 2021 0

Former President Donald Trump was unhappy with his impeachment lawyer Bruce Castor's opening argument on the Senate floor Tuesday, two people familiar...