BREAKING: Mysterious 50-foot sea monster terrorizes Democrats on the East Coast
WASHINGTON DC--A mysterious 50-foot sea monster made landfall today and terrorized Democrats all day causing many to flee the US...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
BREAKING: Hillary Clinton demands to know why DNC didn’t cheat this hard for her
SAQUAHENNATCH, NY—Former Democratic nominee for president Hillary Clinton is demanding to know why her party didn't cheat this hard for...
Biden responds to baseless claims of fraud: ‘I stole this election fair and square’
WASHINGTON DC—Self-declared President-Elect Joe Biden has finally responded to the baseless claims of election and voter fraud in a press...
Pope congratulates Biden on being first Catholic US president to support killing babies
VATICAN—Pope Francis called self-proclaimed President-Elect Joe Biden to congratulate him on being the first Catholic US president to support the...
Democrats handing out ‘Unity’ Molotov cocktails in case they lose election court cases
PHILADELPHIA—Representatives of the Biden/Harris campaign and the Democratic National Committee have been distributing "Unity"-branded Molotov cocktails so supporters will be...
Biden celebrates Veterans Day by thanking all the Civil War heroes who voted for him
GETTYSBURG, PA--Self-proclaimed president-elect Joe Biden made a trip to Gettysburg National Battlefield to honor all the Civil War heroes who...
Kamala Harris retracts call for ‘equal outcomes’ now that she won
US—Kamala Harris, has retracted her demand for "equal outcomes" made just before the election now that she has been declared...
BREAKING: Corrupt FBI to investigate corrupt Michigan election
DETROIT—The corrupt Federal Bureau of Investigation will investigate the corrupt Michigan election in order to assure all Americans that the...
BREAKING: GOP sneak in massive amounts of illegal Trump ballots at 4am in key swing states
US—Massive amounts of previously uncounted Trump ballots have been discovered in key swing states such as Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Michigan, and...
Biden to print ‘Black Lives Matter’ on every bomb he will drop on innocent black people
WASHINGTON DC—In a compassionate move, self-identifying president-elect Joe Biden has promised that once he is commander in chief, he will...
