BREAKING: Biden officially changes his name to Cho Bei Den
WASHINGTON DC—Feeling that the election is behind him, Joe Biden has sold the naming rights to the president of the...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
BREAKING: Warren Commission argues ‘magic ballot’ killed President Trump’s election hopes
WASHINGTON DC—The Warren Commission has published the official explanation of how Joe Biden—a candidate with record low enthusiasm—flipped several swing...
VIDEO: Meet two of the dead voters who helped elect Joe Biden
The 2020 presidential election has been really fun—especially for deceased people. The silent majority buried underground voted more in this...
Oregon Health Authority reminds people to wear face masks while smoking crack at Thanksgiving
PORTLAND — The Oregon Health Authority is reminding people to wear face masks while smoking crack at Thanksgiving celebrations. They are...
Hunter Biden surfaces after hearing someone say ‘I’m going to release the crack!’
WASHINGTON DC—Austere businessman and philanthropist Hunter Biden has finally surfaced in Washington DC after hearing someone say she was going...
Gov. Cuomo wins Emmy for Best Portrayal of A Mass Murderer
NEW YORK—Governor Andrew Cuomo has won an Emmy for Best Portrayal of a Mass Murderer during the coronavirus pandemic. He...
GA Sec of State certifies ‘fraud-free’ election in front of a mountain of shredded ballots
ATLANTA—Georgia Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger announced that the Peach State's election had been certified after a hand recount was...
Local leftist replaces his ‘Resist!’ bumper sticker with an ‘Obey’ sticker
OSHKOSH, WI--A local leftist, Wankie McJohnson, has finally switched his 'Resist!' bumper sticker to one that says 'Obey'. "I know...
Mainstream media send hundreds of crickets to cover election fraud press conference
WASHINGTON DC—Mainstream media outlets sent all their best crickets to cover the election fraud case press conference by Trump's legal...
Biden taps son Hunter as Food & Drug Commissioner citing his experience with crack
WASHINGTON DC—Self-proclaimed President-Elect Joe Biden has tapped his son Hunter Biden as his administration's Food & Drug Administration Commissioner citing...
