New evidence proves that Cain killed Abel after first-shooter video game binge
After several prominent figures have hypothesized that violent video games were to blame for the horrific mass shootings recently by...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Liberal confused as to why no one was able to defend himself in his gun-free zone mass shooting
Local liberal Nathan Fizzle is completely flummoxed. After a mass shooting last year, he thought he had the solution: he...
20 killed in Chicago shootings over weekend but there was no racist manifesto so no one cares
CHICAGO – At least 72 people were shot, including 12 fatally, over the weekend in Chicago, another eruption of violence in a city that...
St. Louis man dismayed to learn that he’s actually a Russian bot
Jerry Franklin was just going about his morning as usual, sipping his coffee, checking email, correcting people on the Internet,...
Nation relieved to learn the horrific racist mass shooting was actually just a false flag by the Deep State
Millions we're horrified by the blatant racism of a lone gunman shooting up an El Paso Walmart targeting Latino Americans...
Rep. Cummings uses Baltimore improvement grant to publish rat and mice cookbook
After being criticized for not doing much to solve his districts horrible, rat-infested slums, US Rep. Elijah Cummings (D-MD) has...
Kamala Harris threatens to throw Tulsi Gabbard in jail for claiming she threw too many brown people in jail
Kamala Harris was literally destroyed on the second night of the CNN Democratic debate by several of the other 12,000...
Kamala Harris releases campaign Monopoly game in which all spaces are ‘Go to Jail’
Kamala Harris was literally destroyed on the second night of the CNN Democratic debate by several of the other 12,000...
Each Democratic candidate promises to fix Trump’s booming economy
Despite many disagreements during the debates, Democrats have agreed on a few things including murdering children is a right and...
Elizabeth Warren abruptly murders John Delaney in Democratic debate
Presidential hopeful Elizabeth Warren abruptly murdered fellow candidate John Delaney during the first CNN presidential debate. The incident was reported...
