BREAKING: CNN projects Kamala Harris winner of 2024 presidential election
US—Millions of people took to the street to celebrate as Joe Biden's VP pick Kamala Harris was projected winner of...
Newsbeat
BREAKING: Large political rallies are okay again
NEW YORK—CNN has confirmed that large political rallies are okay again as long as they are full of people celebrating...
Trump supporters loot and pillage local Walmart after Biden declared winner
SHEBOYGAN, WI--Racist supporters of President Donald Trump descended on a local Walmart to loot and pillage in protest of Democratic...
BREAKING: Nevada switches to Common Core math with 10k Republican votes left to count
LAS VEGAS—Election officials in Nevada warned that they may not have results for the presidential election until some time after...
Biden: ‘They aren’t illegal ballots, they’re undocumented votes’
WASHINGTON DC—Presidential nominee Joe Biden has defended the vast number of illegal votes being uncovered by citizens around the country...
Jeffrey Epstein’s prison guards hired to ensure secure election in Philadelphia
PHILADELPHIA—The New York Metropolitan Jail guards who were watching Jeffrey Epstein while he was suicided have been brought in to ensure...
BREAKING: Wisconsin officials find 170,000 Biden ballots on Chinese shipping container
MADISON, WI—It appeared that President Donald Trump was going to win Wisconsin in the 2020 election until—quite miraculously—election officials discovered...
PA election results delayed until 2022 due to use of Common Core math to tally votes
PHILADELPHIA—Election officials in Pennsylvania warned that they may not have results for the presidential election until some time after 2021...
BREAKING: Biden gets largest turnout ever stopping by a Trump rally
BUTLER, PA—Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden got his largest turnout ever for a campaign rally as he made a last-minute...
Biden promises to transgender in first 100 days, becoming the first woman president
In a last minute pander, Joe Biden has announced that, if he's elected, he will transition to a woman to...
