After deadly Ohio train derailment, Transportation Sec Buttigieg vows to go on train vacation next
EAST PALESTINE, OH—Following the deadly train derailment in Ohio in which hundreds of thousands of pounds of toxic chemicals were...
Politics
BREAKING: Eagles win Super Bowl LVII after scoring 6 TDs at 4 am when no one was watching
PHOENIX—The Philadelphia Eagles, along with the rest of the world, thought they had lost Super Bowl LVII when they went...
US facing ‘massive shortage’ of conspiracy theories as all of them have come true
US—The United States is experiencing the worst shortage of conspiracy theories in decades as all of them have come true...
Biden only needed 3 shots of adrenochrome to stay up this late
WASHINGTON, DC--America can rest easy. We are in good hands. If you were worried about the mental and physical health...
BREAKING: President Biden Utters First Fully Coherent Sentence of His Presidency
UNITED STATES—President Biden broke a record today after uttering his first fully coherent sentence of his presidency. The sentence? “Why...
BREAKING: Biden posts TikTok video celebrating the end of Chinese spying
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden posted a video of him dancing on the TikTok social media platform to celebrate his ending...
Here Are All of the Items Found in that Chinese Spy Balloon Shot Down by the U.S. Military
UNITED STATES—This past week a spy balloon belonging to the Communist Party of China (CCP) was shot down off the...
BREAKING: Chinese spy balloon spotted flying over North America
The Pentagon is tracking a suspected Chinese spy balloon that is making its way over the northern US, a further strain on...
FBI reports they found nothing that would incriminate the FBI in Biden beach home search
WILMINGTON, DE—The FBI has reported that they have found nothing that would incriminate the FBI in the search of President*...
