Elon Musk buys Motel 6 to build first motel on Mars
CARROLTON, TX—Elon Musk announced the purchase of Motel 6 from the Blackstone Group, this morning. He said the nationwide, popular...
Science
Dozens protest attack on women’s rights without being able to define ‘women’
WASHINGTON, DC—Dozens of protesters descended on the nation's capital to protest an attack on women's rights despite not being able...
To save black lives, Biden orders menthol factories to start providing abortions instead cigarettes
WASHINGTON, DC—In an effort to help the black community and save black lives, the Biden administration announced its intention today...
BREAKING: Elon Musk opens salt mine sourced only from liberal tears following Twitter acquisition
AUSTIN—Tesla CEO Elon Musk is venturing into new businesses. He is now selling salt sourced solely from liberal tears following...
White House: Biden’s hands identify as separate personality dubbed ‘Handsy’
WASHINGTON, DC—Psychologists say, after years of repression, it looks like President Biden has developed split personality disorder. A representative from...
SCIENCE: CIS men are actually transmen trapped in the bodies of transwomen-the most oppressed group ever
ST. LOUIS—In a new Pew Pew study that will surely lead to the self-immolation of thousands of social justice warriors,...
NEW: Joe Biden diet and exercise program will take the pounds of in no time
Looking to lose weight and get healthy? We have the perfect diet and exercise plan for you: https://rumble.com/embed/vxbb1j/?pub=w2au8
Amazon’s ‘The Lord of the Rings: Rings of Power’ replaces all villains with Putin
HOLLYWOOD—The multi-million dollar TV series Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power is set to enlighten us in September...
BREAKING: Local man creates time machine by moving clock forward 1 hour every morning
PLEASANTVILLE—Myron Slipnicks says he has traveled into the future simply by moving his clock ahead 1 hour every morning. He...
SCOTUS nominee brings a biologist with her every time she goes to the bathroom to tell her which one to use
WASHINGTON, DC—Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson refused to define the word “woman” in her Supreme Court confirmation hearing Tuesday, asserting that...
