BREAKING: Sam Bankman-Fried has tragically died in a plane crash tomorrow
NEW YORK—In a shocking coincidence, Sam Bankman-Fried, the man who used stolen crypto funds to donate to Democratic Party candidates,...
Tech
Elon Musk sets new world record for not killing himself after revealing Deep State censorship
US—Last month Genesius Times, and News That Matters heralded Elon Musk's new world record for not killing himself after publicly...
FBI Concerned About Outbreak of Free Speech on Twitter
There’s been an explosion of free speech on Twitter since Musk bought the company, and that has the FBI very...
BREAKING: Pentagon hires Sam Bankman-Fried after proving he can lose money as fast as anyone
US—The Department of Defense has hired embattled cryptocurrency Ponzi schemer Sam Bankman-Fried after he lost $16 billion overnight. "We saw...
BREAKING: Trump struggling to think of a mean tweet worth $44 billion
After much anticipation, Elon Musk restored former President Donald Trump's popular Twitter account over the weekend. https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1594131768298315777 However, Trump has...
In response to Biden-Ukraine-FTX money laundering scandal, Congress to impeach Trump again
US—Rocked by revelations that now-bankrupt cryptocurrency company FTX and Alameda Hedge Fund used Ukrainian aid to donate to Democratic political...
BREAKING: Thousands of liberals hospitalized with severe exposure to free speech on Twitter
US—Hospitals across the country have recently been inundated with patients who have been exposed to a new threatening exposure to...
AOC launches GoFundMe to pay for $8 fee to keep blue checkmark on Twitter
Times are tough for leftists. Not only are they getting destroyed in the polls for the midterm elections, but now...
BREAKING: Twitter bans Elon Musk for life, saying that firing them violates Twitter’s Terms of Service
SILICON VALLEY, CA—Twitter, On Monday, announced the platform would permanently ban Elon Musk for violating their terms of service by...
BREAKING: Grindr drops Paul Pelosi sponsorship after he turns on his gay sex hammer Grindr date
SAN FRANCISCO—The gay sex dating app Grindr has dropped their Paul Pelosi sponsorship after he turned on his gay sex...
