Trump selects Jeb Bush for Secretary of the Department of Low Energy 
AOC demands Black Friday be renamed ‘Friday of Color’ 
Donald Trump picks Elizabeth Warren to head Bureau of Indian Affairs 
Outgoing Transportation Sec. Pete Buttigieg taps P. Diddy for mission to destroy Uranus 
BREAKING: Biden Sneaks in Pardon for Hunter During Annual Turkey Pardon Ceremony 
BREAKING: Joe Biden gets stuck sniffing woman who used Gorilla Glue for hairspray
BATON ROUGE, LA—TikToker Tessica Brown thought she had seen the end of her problems after uploading a video in which...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Cuomo hires crack team to find the ‘real killer’ of NY nursing home COVID victims
NEW YORK CITY—New York Governor Andrew Coumo has announced that he is taking responsibility for the COVID deaths in his...
Disney gives all princesses a brave makeover to fight wrongthink
VISTA DE MAL, CA—In its campaign to fight wrongthink, Disney has given all of their celebrated princesses a stunning and...
Disney fires Jabba the Hutt after controversial tweets
VISTA DE MAL—"Jabba the Hutt is not currently employed by Lucasfilm and there are no plans for him to be...
BREAKING: The Dallas Mavericks secede from the United States
DALLAS—NBA team the Dallas Mavericks, led by owner Mark Cuban, have seceded from the United States. Cuban on Tuesday told...
To be more inclusive, Disney fires only woman on ‘The Mandalorian’
VISTA DEL MAL, CA—In an effort to be more inclusive, Disney has fired Gina Carano, the only female on their...
Teachers unions call for schools to be closed forever so children never get sick again
UNITED STATES—In a joint letter today, many of the nation’s most influential teachers’ unions – from the AFT, to the...
Dems schedule impeachment for every past and future Republican president
WASHINGTON, DC—Following the successful trial of former president Donald Trump, House Democrats have scheduled impeachment proceedings for every past and...
BREAKING: Trump replaces impeachment team with Zoom call cat lawyer
Former President Donald Trump was unhappy with his impeachment lawyer Bruce Castor's opening argument on the Senate floor Tuesday, two people familiar...
Democrats to impeach all 75 million Americans who voted for Trump
WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning and unprecedented move, Senate Democrats have subjected all 75 million Americans who voted for Trump to...
