Donald Trump picks Elizabeth Warren to head Bureau of Indian Affairs 
Outgoing Transportation Sec. Pete Buttigieg taps P. Diddy for mission to destroy Uranus 
BREAKING: Biden Sneaks in Pardon for Hunter During Annual Turkey Pardon Ceremony 
Farewell, X: Why I’m Leaving Over Their Refusal to Censor Me 
Bernie declares eating $6.2 million duct-taped bananas a human right to be paid for by government 
BREAKING: Texas to send 1000 electors since the Constitution doesn’t matter anymore
AUSTIN—The state of Texas is preparing to send 1,000 electors to the electoral college since the Supreme Court has ruled...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
BREAKING: Supreme Court rules that states should go to war to settle differences
The Supreme Court of the United States ruled today that if states in the Union have differences that they should...
Buttigieg wants China ambassadorship after learning there are no black people there
SOUTH BEND, IN—Former Democratic presidential candidate Pete Buttigieg has requested the Chinese ambassadorship after learning that there are no black...
BREAKING: Supreme Court rules against Texas, Trump in 6-5 vote
WASHINGTON DC—The Supreme Court has ruled against the State of Texas and President Donald Trump in a close six to...
Biden’s worship of the Devil puts him at odds with some of his fellow Catholics
WASHINGTON DC—In January of 1961, John F. Kennedy, became the first Catholic President of the United States. Now, sixty years...
YouTube unveils its new logo
MOUNTAINVIEW, CA—YouTube’s CEO Susan Wojcicki unveiled YouTube's new logo today in Sillicon Valley, launching a rebranding effort that more closely...
Do you suffer from premature inauguration or electile dysfunction? Talk to your doctor about Trunalim
Do you suffer from premature inauguration? How about electile dysfunction Maybe you should ask your doctor if Trunalim (trunalimunumaprzure TDS)...
First COVID vaccine recipients are feeling ‘great’
LONDON—The first recipients of the much-anticipated COVID-19 vaccine say that they're doing "great!" Several recipients in UK and US have...
BREAKING: Rep. Swalwell: ‘Russian hackers made me sleep with Chinese spy’
SAN FRANCISCO—US Representative Eric Swalwell has admitted to sleeping with a Chinese spy during his ascent to the House but...
BREAKING: Sarah Fuller wins the Heisman Trophy for ‘kicking off with a vagina’
The NCAA Heisman committee has awarded the prestigious college football award to Sarah Fuller for "kicking off with a vagina."...
