Outgoing Transportation Sec. Pete Buttigieg taps P. Diddy for mission to destroy Uranus 
BREAKING: Biden Sneaks in Pardon for Hunter During Annual Turkey Pardon Ceremony 
Farewell, X: Why I’m Leaving Over Their Refusal to Censor Me 
Bernie declares eating $6.2 million duct-taped bananas a human right to be paid for by government 
Jaguar introduces new car to match its new ad campaign 
BREAKING: Anonymous sources reveal Donald Trump ‘loathes midgets’
WASHINGTON DC—One time, privately, months ago, in front of Democrats, during election season, President Donald Trump allegedly said, "I hate...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Biden names Cardi B Health Secretary after important fellatio PSA
WILMINGTO, DE—Demcratic presidential nominee Joe Biden has selected hip hop phenomenon Cardi B to be his Health and Human Services...
BREAKING: The Atlantic’s anonymous source is unmasked
After the prestigious journalistic-y publication The Atlantic bravely reported on President Trump's secret hatred and disrespect for the military, many...
Smith & Wesson names Antifa their #1 salesman for 2020
It looks like gun sales are through the roof. It seems like not only is there a 6-month waiting list...
Dead Antifa protesters enjoying a fiery but ‘mostly peaceful’ afterlife
HELL—Several recently deceased Antifa warriors are enjoying a fiery but "mostly peaceful" afterlife in the eternal fires of Hell. A...
Netflix releases 3rd season of Making A Murderer: Andrew Cuomo
Netflix has raised the bar of television degeneracy. The entertainment behemoth have released the third season of the hit series...
Australians shocked to find they have no right to free speech after giving up their guns
MELBOURNE--Australians have been shocked to find that they have no right to free speech shortly after giving up their guns....
Bill releases dirt on Hillary so she will just get it over with and kill him already
After a Zoom interview gone bad, former Bill Clinton has decided to release dirt on his wife Hillary so she...
BLM condemns white blood cells for oppressing cells of color
Black Lives Matter is not content burning down black neighborhoods to prove they care. Now they are coming for your...
Innovative California police department goes 100% transparent
BAD WATER, CA—The town of Bad Water has decided to have the most transparent police force in America. Considered by...
