Jaguar introduces new car to match its new ad campaign 
BREAKING: I was raped by whoever Trump selects for one of his cabinet positions 
BREAKING: Elon Musk buys MSNBC to constantly air video of Alex Jones giving Morning Joe and Mika noogies 
CNN: Startled by Loud Noises, President Kennedy Trips and Falls in Limousine 
This Day In Mostly-Peaceful History: President Kennedy Goes Scenic Ride through Dallas 
Charlize Theron begins transitioning son into Tyrannosaurus Rex
Hollywood actress and professional virtue signaler Charlize Theron is the perfect mother, treating her children exactly as they want to...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Bernie promises Americans a 0-hour work day if elected president
At the Iowa United Food and Commercial Workers forum on Sunday, democratic socialist presidential candidate Bernie Sanders was asked whether he would...
Beto seen trying to convince Texas church security to wait for police during shooting
WHITE SETTLEMENT, Texas—Armed members of the West Freeway Church of Christ stopped an alleged mass shooter from killing more than...
Man sues Burger King after ‘Impossible Whopper’ turns him into a woman
A local man is suing Burger King after one Impossible Whopper, the company's manufactured vegan meat burger, turned him into...
Thousands demand Trump’s impeachment before they end up with jobs
Unemployed liberals across the country are fuming at the low unemployment rate numbers, so much so that they are demanding...
Merry Refugeemas! Saint Negligence promises a fake asylum seeker for every supporter of amnesty!
The Christmas Holiday is well known despite the efforts of Secular legal precedence set forth in the 1960s, but a...
BREAKING: Bernie Sanders caught impersonating Santa and stealing 90% of people’s gifts from under tree
Presidential candidate and ardent democratic socialist Bernie Sanders has been arrested for impersonating Santa Claus and entering people's homes in...
ABC swaps offensive Red Ryder BB Gun in ‘A Christmas Story’ with Frozen Elsa doll
The beloved Christmas movie A Christmas Story is getting a facelift in the new progressive era. Now, instead of Ralph...
Virginia replaces armed warrior on state flag with gender-fluid submissive
The new Democratic Virginia legislature isn't wasting any time progressing the state forward. After threatening to send the National Guard...
AOC draws up articles of impeachment for Nancy Pelosi for not delivering Trump’s articles of impeachment
More confusion has occurred with the impeachment effort being done by democrats. The party of Fast & Furious & Benghazi...
