Elon Musk needs to stop doing amazing things because it’s making us gender studies triple-doctorates feel worthless 
BREAKING: Trump considering replacing Federal Reserve with much more reliable Magic 8 Ball 
BREAKING: Dems cheer Laken Riley’s murder As ‘A very, very late term abortion’ 
White House: Nuclear Armageddon was always a key part of Biden’s ‘Build Back Better’ agenda 
Transwomen complain about uniforms crushing their balls during dominating performance 
White supremacists applaud New York abortion law that will kill more minorities than ever
The New York Legislature has passed an ultra-progressive bill that Governor Andrew Cuomo has signed, making abortion legal up to...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
New York Governor Cuomo wears pink to celebrate all the female babies he’s going to kill
In a proud moment for all women, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo wore a pink tie and has instructed the...
NFL referees Cavaletto and Robinson ‘pretty sure’ Hurricane Katrina didn’t happen either
After the Saints-Rams game, which included the worst no-call in football history, referees Cavaletto and Robinson made some more bold...
Ocasio-Cortez to quit Congress and become full-time soothsayer
New York, N.Y.—In an abrupt announcement not a month into her historic first term, N.Y. Congresswoman Alexandra Ocasio-Cortez has declared...
DC city council outlaws ‘smiling terrorism’ after Covington Catholic incident
You've probably seen the video. A teenage boy--all 110 pounds of him--looking at a grown man and smiling. It's horrifying...
Social justice warrior: ‘Honor MLK by judging others by skin color not the content of their character’
A modern civil rights group called Social Justice Now held a rally on the National Mall today in honor of...
OPINION: Bullying is wrong! That’s why we need to band together and destroy these kids’ lives
Videos have surfaced of a bunch of kids at a Washington march, surrounding an old Native American veteran and taunting...
‘Fetuses are parasites,’ says 34-year-old living in parents’ basement
The unemployed Herman Schock, who currently resides in the basement of his parents' house in a suburb of Kansas City,...
Harvard stages Biology 101 book burning to protest ‘misogynistic and transphobic science’
Students and faculty of prestigious Harvard University have staged a massive book-burning of Biology 101 text books to protest the...
Google offers aversion therapy for conservative employees who slipped through the cracks
After several complaints by Google employees that a manager mentioned the deeply problematic and homophobic word "family", the company (NASDAQ:...
