Congress pauses demanding release of Epstein files in order to block release of congressional sex abuse files 
WATCH: Fat Gun: Doughboy 
Iranian general writes scathing 1-star review for Chinese military drones purchased on Temu 
Sources have informed Trump that the Federal Reserve is just 2 weeks away from developing a nuclear weapon 
BREAKING: Khamenei meets 72 virgins after he dies 
PSA: When ICE Says “STOP!” You Need to Collaborate and Listen
Listen up, America. When a federal agent in tactical gear yells “STOP!” at 120 decibels while sprinting toward you in...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
BREAKING: Several Minneapolis Women Shave Their Balls to Protest ICE in Their City
MINNEAPOLIS — In what organizers are calling “the most committed act of somatic solidarity since the Great Tampon Ear Plug...
Leftists Protest new MAHA Food Pyramid by Staging ‘Processed-Carbs-Only’ Sit-in Marathon
WASHINGTON, DC—Dozens of activists gathered on the National Mall today to protest the newly released Dietary Guidelines for Americans, 2025-2030,...
Trump on a Roll: Mamdani Captured and Flown Out of NYC Following ‘Large Scale’ US Attack
NEW YORK — In what White House officials are already calling “Operation Very Tremendous,” U.S. special forces early this morning...
‘No Kings’ protesters demand dictator Maduro be restored to power in Venezuela
Seattle, WA — In a display of unwavering commitment to sovereignty abroad while maintaining flexible standards at home, participants from...
BREAKING: Mamdani opens NYC’s first forced labor camp to generate that ‘warmth of collectivism’
New York, NY – In an innovative push to combat urban apathy and boost communal bonds, City Council Member Zohran...
GOP Leaders Vow Crackdown on ‘Rampant Fraud’ Once They Secure the Presidency, the House, the Senate, and Supreme Court
Washington, D.C. — In a fiery press conference on Capitol Hill today, Republican leaders pledged to finally address the nation's...
BREAKING: Google office quarantined after someone was wished a ‘Merry Christmas’
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA—The Google Headquarters shut down Monday after a delivery man cheerfully wished a receptionist a "Merry Christmas". All...
BREAKING: Shots fired at Nakatomi Plaza in Los Angeles; possible hostage situation
CENTURY CITY, CA—The Los Angeles Police Department, SWAT, and FBI are surrounding Nakatomi Plaza at this hour after an LAPD...
Babylon Bee changes name to The Babylon Bibi in honor of their boss
JUPITER, FL — In a move described by insiders as "long overdue and entirely voluntary," the conservative Christian satire website...