Local Man Arrested for Impersonating NVIDIA CEO Jensen Huang to Hook Up With Hot Chinese Spies 
‘I’m Not a Damn Monkey!’ Says Local Gorilla Demanding Taxonomic Accuracy from Ole Miss Students 
BREAKING: Epstein Island sold to wealthy Middle Eastern businessman Haadid Nahkil Muhssef 
Trump Orders New Border Wall Around Texas for When the Democrats Take Over 
Russell Brand Informs Judge ‘Those R*pes Occurred on Epstein Island;’ Charges Vacated Immediately 
Iran Graciously Lets Democrats Use Their Trademarked slogan “Death to America” for 2026 midterm Election
WASHINGTON — The Islamic Republic of Iran announced Thursday that it would graciously permit several Democratic campaign committees to use...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Macron Caught Playing Lute As France Burns to the Ground
PARIS — President Emmanuel Macron was photographed Thursday evening adjusting the tuning pegs of a lute on the balcony of...
WNBA Bans All Fans From Games After One Pointed at A’ja Wilson
In a decisive move to protect the integrity of the game, the Women’s National Basketball Association announced Wednesday that all...
BREAKING: Thousands of immigrants heading to US to become victims of systemic racism
McALLEN, TX—A migrant caravan from Africa and Central America is heading for the United States to become victims of the...
AOC: Religion, Patriarchy, and Homophobia are Evil, Unless You’re Muslim, In Which Case, They’re Diversity
Let me be crystal, like, structurally clear: religion, patriarchy, and homophobia are violence. Not “beliefs.” Violence. They are how power...
Woman Arrested After Installing Flock Camera Inside Flock CEO’s Home for ‘His Safety’
ATLANTA — A 31-year-old Decatur woman was arrested early Monday after authorities say she entered the Buckhead residence of Flock...
BREAKING: UK Terror suspects all released after explaining that terror is an expression of their religion
UNITED KINGDOM—Five men arrested near RAF Fairford on suspicion of preparing a terrorist act and explosives offences have been released...
97% of climate scientists agree that we only have 18 months to save their jobs
An international body of nearly 100 climate scientists convened by the United Nations have issued a stern warning to the...
Local Man Unsure Whether $4 Gas Justifies Voting for Completely Gay and Retarded Commies
A local resident expressed measured skepticism this week over whether an increase of approximately one dollar per gallon at the...
‘$4 Gas is Outrageous!’ Says Woman Happy To Pay $5 Under Biden
Local resident Cora Upshin, a dedicated Democrat and self-described "principled consumer," took to X this week to voice her profound...
